Archive for the 'Simpsonized' Category

28
Dec
09

The Petty Greed of a Large and Wealthy Organization

The Joy of Sect4

“Oh I feel for you my child and, I’d like you help you . . . ahem.” – Rev. Lovejoy

There was some hubbub over the long holiday weekend because L’Osservatore Romano, an official Vatican newspaper, said some nice things about The Simpsons.  This doesn’t particularly surprise me, Zombie Simpsons has become so institutionalized that even the world’s oldest surviving organization no longer finds it threatening.  That kind of approval is a pretty damning indictment for a program that found its original popularity in an explicitly anti-authority message. 

But I was curious as to what exactly the Catholic Church found praiseworthy and so I tried to find the original article.  It wasn’t on the hilariously primitive (and incomplete) official website, but there was an e-mail link to request articles.  So I wrote a very polite and friendly e-mail requesting either the text of the article or just a link to where the text was found.  I figured that they had it easily available and would probably send it to me and that I’d have to say something nice about the Catholic Church for a change.  My cynicism doesn’t fail me very often, but I do enjoy it when it does. 

Instead of the article or a link I received . . .  an order form – literally.  The e-mail I got back told me that the article in question was only published in Italian, but if I would like a copy I could have one for the low price of just eight Euros (Visa and MasterCard most definitely accepted).  Setting aside the fact that they want to charge me eight Euros for an article in a language I don’t read, there’s the bigger rip off of asking eight Euros for a copy and paste job.  It’s not like some hooded figure will have to descend into the archives by torchlight to retrieve this, it was published (electronically!) a week ago.  Pointing me to the article would’ve taken the exact same amount of time as copying and pasting the order form.  And they’re not asking for some trivial amount of money either, eight Euros is half a week’s earnings for half of humanity

I don’t care in the least whether or not anyone wants to believe in a higher power, but organized religion is humanity’s longest running scam and they give themselves away through sheer pettiness. 

01
May
09

Nude Conspiracy on the Supreme Court

 

Now accepting bachelorette party reservations.

Now accepting bachelorette party reservations.

It was announced this morning that nerd of note David Souter, left, plans to retire back to his home state of New Hampshire at the end of the Supreme Court’s current term in June.  

Now, we all know that Earl Warren was secretly a stripper, and then on Wednesday’s Colbert Report we learned that Justice Stephen Breyer used to have people stick things in his underwear, “mostly singles” according to Colbert.  (The story starts at the 4:20 mark.)  If we put those two factesque things together we’re left with an obvious and inescapable conclusion: a cabal of strippers has been overseeing our country’s jurisprudence since at least the 1950s.    

The New York Times reports that:

Justice Souter . . . has grown increasingly sour on Washington and intends to return to his home state, New Hampshire, according to the people briefed on his plans.

I couldn’t find any male strip clubs in New Hampshire, but I did find Male Encounter Boston, “New England’s longest running all male revue”.  Are they hiring, I wonder?  After all, that’s a man who knows how to properly grip a gavel and you could hide absolutely anything under that robe . . .

02
Feb
09

Simpsonized Simpsons


“If he marries your mother, Marge, we’ll be brother and sister!  And then, our kids, they’ll be horrible freaks with pink skin, no overbites and five fingers on each hand!” – Homer Simpson

That Simpsonizer website is the best thing real fans got out of that mostly crappy movie; I hope they never take it down.  And so, for no reason whatsoever, I put images of the Simpsons themselves into the Simpsonizer.  
Presented without further comment.  



E-Mail

deadhomersociety (at) gmail

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Twitter Updates

  • RT @tubatron: A few more pages of my Bart the Genius script with sketches made at table read. http://t.co/do1hyhPyqK // 3 days ago
  • “Bart, don’t feed your sister hotels.” – Marge “Don’t worry, Mom, there’s tons of these things.” – Bart http://t.co/rFV0QPNhXD // 3 days ago
  • “Milhouse told me my meatloaf ‘sucks’. He must’ve gotten that from your little boy, because they certainly don’t say that word on TV.” // 3 days ago
  • “Oh, ‘meltdown’, it’s one of those annoying buzzwords. We prefer to call it an unrequested fission surplus.” – Burns http://t.co/3WDoaibUKj // 3 days ago
  • “She says you’re a bad influence.” – Milhouse “Bad influence my butt! How many times have I told you? Never listen to your mother!” – Bart // 4 days ago

Useful Legal Tidbit

Even though it’s obvious to anyone with a functional frontal lobe and a shred of morality, we feel the need to include this disclaimer. This website (which openly advocates for the cancellation of a beloved television series) is in no way, shape or form affiliated with the FOX Network, the News Corporation, subsidiaries thereof, or any of Rupert Murdoch’s wives or children. “The Simpsons” is (unfortunately) the intellectual property of FOX. We and our crack team of one (1) lawyer believe that everything on this site falls under the definition of Fair Use and is protected by the First Amendment to the United States Constitution. No revenue is generated from this endeavor; we’re here because we love “The Simpsons”. And besides, you can’t like, own a potato, man, it’s one of Mother Earth’s creatures.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 433 other followers