Posts Tagged ‘A Fish Called Selma


Quote of the Day

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“So, working at the DMV must be very interesting.” – Troy McClure
“I think I’m getting repetitive stress disorder from scratching my butt all day.” – Selma Bouvier


Quote of the Day

A Fish Called Selma12

“Yeah, it’s a good idea, Homer, but they’ve already made some movies about World War II.” – Drunken Troy McClure


Quote of the Day

A Fish Called Selma11

“Tonight, Seventies leading man Troy McClure has finally met the woman of his dreams.  We may remem-. . . woman?  Huh.  Okay.  We may remember Troy from such films as The Verdict Was Mail Fraud and Leper in the Backfield.” – Not John Tesh


Bonus Quote of the Day

A Fish Called Selma10

“This better be important.  It’s my wedding night, I’m trying to sleep.” – Troy McClure

Phil Hartman would’ve been 65 today.  Happy birthday.


Quote of the Day

Rained Out Ballgame

“Movie For a Rained-Out Ballgame now returns to Dyan Cannon, Troy McClure, and the Muppets in the 1977 film, The Muppets Go Medieval.” – TV Announcer


Today in Things I Thought Already Happened

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“Watch out, Laszlo Panaflex!” – Troy McClure

Matt Groening is getting a tile on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.  I found this out via a press release we got this afternoon, but if you’d asked me this morning whether or not he already had one, I would’ve said “Probably?”.  Here are the official details:


WHO:      Matt Groening 
                  Emcee: Hollywood Chamber of Commerce, President/CEO Leron Gubler 
                  Guest speakers:  Hank Azaria (voice of Moe, Chief Wiggum, plus others) 
                  and Yeardley Smith (voice of Lisa Simpson). 

WHAT:    2,459th Star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame in the Category of

WHERE: 7021 Hollywood Boulevard at the corner of Sycamore near The
                  Simpson’s star

WHEN:   Tuesday, February 14, 2012 at 11:30 a.m.

“The Simpson’s star”?  Does no one at hip, edgy Web 2.0 marketing firms proofread anymore?  The rest of the press release contains more indirect comedy, like the mini-biography that uses the registered trademark symbol four times in five sentences, just in case you forgot that “Life In Hell®” after the first one.  More amusing still is this bit from the legalese at the end:

The information in this email and any attached files is confidential. It is intended solely for the use of the addressee. Any unauthorized disclosure or use is prohibited.

It’s a fucking press release!  The whole point of sending it to me is to get me to disclose its contents, but apparently that’s prohibited.  Oops. 

Anyway, good for Groening.  And if anyone goes to the ceremony, do me a favor and count how many times they make “what an honor to have people’s shoes all over my name” type jokes. 


Reading Digest: Muppets Edition

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“Dad, what’s a Muppet?” – Lisa Simpson
“Well, it’s not quite a mop, and it’s not quite a puppet, but man . . . so to answer your question, I don’t know.” – Homer Simpson

Shorter than usual Reading Digest this week on account of Thanksgiving, but there are a couple of links relating to the new Muppet movie.  One is the quote above, which was very popular when discussing the revival of the moribund Muppets franchise, the other is a reference to none other than Poochie by the director himself.  As usual, once The Simpsons comments on something, it sticks around forever.  Besides that there’s two great pieces of fan art, some excellent usage, the pepper spray meme, and some despair at network television’s fan unfriendly cancellation decisions. 


Milhouse Art – Smooth Charlie’s Link of the Week is this excellent fan made Milhouse art.  I especially like the second one. 

Nobody Likes Milhouse! – Animated .gif with subtitles.

Occupy Wall Street Supporter Makes Jay-Z "Scrooge" Sculpture – That is a neat sculpture, particularly the Mr. Burns head sandwiched between Hova and Scrooge McDuck. 

Pepper spraying cop meme: next level – Chief Wiggum goes to UC Davis.  

IAR Press Conference Coverage: ‘The Muppets’ – Lots of people quoted this in response to the new Muppets movie, please consider this link a stand in for the rest of them:

In a now ancient but in no way diminished episode of The Simpsons, Lisa asks Homer, "Dad, what’s a Muppet?"  To which her father replies, "Well, it’s not quite a mop, and not quite a puppet, but man," and laughs with a satisfied chuckle before adding, "To answer your question: I don’t know."  Aside from being a typically quotable moment of vintage Simpsons, this exchange actually gets to the essence of The Muppets.  Intellectually, we know that Jim Henson‘s creations are simply felt puppets, yet they’re imbued with such character and life that we wholly believe them as living organisms with heart and soul.

Excellent usage.

Director James Bobin Talks ‘The Muppets’ – Hey, speaking of the Muppets, here’s an interview with the director of the new movie about a new Muppet they made:

Anytime you hear that, there’s going to be a new character, you’re all, “Oh no…” It’s like in The Simpsons, when they did that great episode about the skateboarding ninja dog.

Oh yeah, Poochie!

Poochie! Right, Poochie is a guy who’s created by the network to make it cool. They just have this disastrous idea, and they have another random character who’s just living in [The Simpsons’] house. The Simpsons were always very honest about that sort of thing. Literally, the death knell of any great idea is that committee coming together to create a character to put in the show, because the demographics demand it.

The Simpsons named US TV show with greatest influence on Britain – I don’t know enough about British culture to speak to this, but you’ll get no argument from me. 

The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword…In 10 Words – Lee Carvallo, you’ve done it again.

Pyjamas – Slightly cleverer than the usual Krusty Brand Seal of Approval stuff, it’s a t-shirt with Homer’s body so the wearer’s head goes where Homer’s would.  It does clash slightly with the ruggedly handsome model.  At least he’s got the five o’clock shadow. 

Three of a Kind – Expounding on the superiority of the SEC to the shattered remains of the Big 12:

The Big 12 is 2 teams deep right now.  And one of those teams lost to the worst team in the big 12 since the big 12 was ever thought of.  To quote Moe Syzlak “they’re the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.”  Yes, I’m talking about Iowa State.

The quote is slightly off, he says “They were the suckiest”, and of course it was Homer who said it, not Moe.  Apparently Ess Eee Cee speed does not allow for double checking things. 

“Yeah, I used to be rich.  I owned Mickey Mouse Massage Parlors, then those Disney sleazeballs shut me down.  I said, ‘Look, I’ll change the logo, put Mickey’s pants back on!’  Pfft, some guys you just can’t reason with.” – Railroad Bridge Bum (The Simpsons) – “Well, I used to own a successful car company.  My strategy was giving ’em Japanese names.  You guys ever drive a Tempura hatchback?”

My Six-Year-Old Sings the Blues – Excellent usage:

But since we’re mother and daughter, I assume that there’s some connection between her desire to steep herself in sadness when she’s sad and my tendency towards annoyance when people try to cheer me out of the doldrums.

“The blues isn’t about feeling better, it’s about making other people feel worse, and making a few bucks while you’re at it.” – Bleeding Gums Murphy (from The Simpsons)

Let’s Get Animated! – A top ten list of animated comedies.  The Simpsons gets the top spot for obvious reasons, but I was pleasantly surprised to see The Critic at #4, and Mission Hill even makes an appearance. 

Network Television has no humanity – This is true:

Network Television, if they’re not killing wonderful TV shows in their prime, then they just start beating a dead horse! I think we can all agree, that even though The Office is a great show, it would have been better if they had just took a leave out of the book of their British counterpart and ENDED THE SHOW WHILE THEY WERE AHEAD! Same goes for the Simpsons…. I mean really?

Really.  Sad, but really. 


Reading Digest: Getting Off the Planet of the Apes Edition

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“I love you, Dr. Zaius!” – Troy McClure

Today, Hollywood’s second attempt to reboot a 1960s sci-fi franchise that (except for the first one) wasn’t that good in the first place opens in theaters nationwide.  This has prompted everyone and their mother to mention and post links to Troy McClure and “Stop the Planet of the Apes, I Want to Get Off!”.  I’ve winnowed it down to just a couple of links below, including two different bootleg videos of the multi-million dollar musical in question.  I hope they invited Jeff Goldblum to the premier.  On top of that, we’ve got two people who agree with us, poor political usage, some tattoos, and an actual Zombie Simpson.


The Alabaster Sock – Smooth Charlie’s Click of the Week is this excellently anguished Simpsons rant that wouldn’t be out of place on our very own homepage.  I particularly like this:

It could be an easily ignored program if it didn’t seem like a mediocre puppeteer controlling the corpse of something once great. So I avoid it not just because it’s no good, but because it’s no good and it was once the greatest and that makes me cringe.

Highly recommended.

Keeping up with The Simpsons – This is another anodyne article about the animation process from that tour they gave reporters a couple of weeks ago.  I just thought I’d highlight this:

With the series approaching its 500th episode — a milestone it will reach in February — Kirkland admits one of the big challenges is trying not to repeat themselves. When a recent script called for Homer to harpoon a whale, Kirkland recalled that he’d already animated that.

If that’s not the perfect anecdote for where the show is right now, I don’t know what is.

Rise of The Planet of The Apes…In 10 Words – C’mon, you knew this was coming.  I still laughed.

Zombie Bart Simpson by ~Beth182 on deviantART – Awesome fan made drawing of a true Zombie Simpson.  (There are a couple of links at the bottom to some of her other Simpsons drawings as well.)

simpsons embroidery project – part 3: slowly but surely – Simpsons embroidery is back, baby!  It’s Homer with his giant foam cowboy hat and air horn.  In ink or fabric, the look on his face remains priceless.

QUOTABLES – A couple of fan made designs with quotes from the show.  Nice.

Sen. Amy Koch sees political ‘classic situation’ in poll results – Poor political usage:

She repeated a bit of dialogue from the episode in which a mechanized disc jockey, DJ 2000, was being unveiled:

“How ’bout those clowns in Congress?” DJ 2000 says. 

“How does he keep up with current events like that?” an obviously impressed Homer wonders.

Nice try, State Senator.  For the record, the actual quote is:

DJ 3000: Looks like those clowns in Congress did it again.  What a bunch of clowns.

Bill: How does he keep up with the news like that?

Santa Cruz X The Simpsons – Some larger and better images of a couple of those new Simpsons skateboards from last week.

The 50 Best Queer Girl TV Episodes Of All Time: 50-41. – Our friend Lenny will be back with another guest post next week, consider the Simpsons entry here a small preview.

The ‘Entourage’ has relationship problems – I must be pretty unplugged from Entourage because I only recognize three of the six guys in that photo, but if someone wants to take Zombie Simpsons off the air, it’s fine by me:

“We’ve all been humbled in this group, but we will all prevail,” Billy emphatically tells his two stars. “We’re going to murder the ‘Simpsons!’”

Test your knowledge of The Simpsons with iOS apps – A list of some Simpsons apps for iOS.

Homer Simpson called – I can’t tell if that’s plastic or a picture of a real donut with sprinkles and pink frosting.  But if it is real, I would eat it in approximately 2.3 seconds.  It’s just gorgeous.

Homer Simpson’s Voice Will Appear on Parks and Recreation Next Season – The headline tells you everything you need to know.

Tattoo Os Simpsons Das Telas Para As Peles – A picture of an elaborate, Halloween themed Simpsons tattoo.  Here’s another from the same site of Ralph, Blinky, Smilin’ Joe Fission and others.

Aping the apes: TV’s top ‘Planet’ parodies – A bunch of clips of Planet of the Apes parodies, including Troy McClure’s Broadway turn.

Top Ten Tuesday: RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES Fashion Statements – Some side by side photos of various Planet of the Apes movies, accompanied by video of McClure that’s partially in Spanish (or something similar to Spanish).

Neato: Animation Color Wheel – Pretty much what it says, a giant color wheel made up of characters ranging from SpongeBob to Snagglepuss.

The Simpsons vs. Family Guy vs. South Park vs… – Not only did I get to start with someone who agrees with us this week, I get to end that way too.  This is a short discussion about animated comedy, but it does contain this:

“Besides Archer and a couple others, my knowledge of animated TV comedy stops about 7 years ago (maybe longer), when I still had a soft spot for The Simpsons and found Family Guy to be a super-derivative, unoriginal ripoff.  Perhaps FG has funnied itself up since then?  I know The Simpsons has not.”

No, no it has not.


Compare & Contrast: Selma & Her Famous Husbands

“Cigarette, Mrs. McClure?” – Waiter
“You bet!  From now on, she’s smoking for two.” – Troy McClure

Once upon a time, Selma married a famous guy for all the wrong reasons and it didn’t work out.  Fifteen years later, Zombie Simpsons decided they hadn’t regurgitated that plot line recently, and did it again.  I am speaking, of course, of “A Fish Called Selma” and “The Real Housewives of Fat Tony”.  There are three specific scenes I want to compare:

1.) Meeting Mr. Wrong at the DMV

2.) Getting Hitched

3.) The Big Reveal (wherein it is revealed that this marriage isn’t going to work out)

Obviously more than that goes on, especially in “A Fish Called Selma”, which uses Troy McClure’s resurgent career to mock celebrity, Broadway, and the movie business.  But both episodes contain all three of those scenes, and they match up extraordinarily well (or poorly, depending on your point of view).

1. Meeting the Husband

Selma initially meets both Troy McClure and Fat Tony in the course of her work as one of the desk lords at the department of motor vehicles.  Right away, the radically different quality standards of The Simpsons and Zombie Simpsons are apparent.  Both Troy and Tony are famous, and neither is very likely to walk into some gray government office and hit it off with one of the most homely employees.  The Simpsons took the time to show us why McClure was there, as well as why he’d be interested in Selma; Zombie Simpsons couldn’t be bothered, and had Fat Tony (along with the rest of Springfield) be there just because.

In “A Fish Called Selma”, Troy McClure gets pulled over (in his dented DeLorean, no less) and told to head down to the DMV to get his license changed if he wants to drive without his glasses.  This one scene means he’s not only got a reason to go to that drab office, but to make nice with whomever he finds behind the counter.  We also know that he’s no longer a big enough star to have some lackey do this kind of thing for him.

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They do kinda make him look like a nerd.

Tony, on the other hand, is a connected and powerful mob boss.  What the hell is he doing at the DMV in line with citizens?  He seems like he’d have underlings to go fetch dinky forms for him (which, by the way, he does in “A Fish Called Selma”).  Setting that aside, the show could still give us a reason why he’d be there.  And, let’s face it, if you can’t think of several funny reasons for a mob boss to need to go to the DMV, you probably shouldn’t be working as a comedy writer.  This is how low the give-a-shit level is for Zombie Simpsons, they couldn’t be bothered to come up with a reason – even a jokey one – for the two main characters to meet.

It’s so transparently lazy that you can almost see them working backwards: deciding they want to do something with Jersey Shore, realizing they could use Fat Tony, casting about for a way to involve the Simpsons, hitting on marrying him to Selma, and then barfing up a poorly contrived way for them to meet (which is unrelated to everything else in the episode).  There’s nothing wrong with working backwards, but do the audience the courtesy of at least trying to cover your tracks.

2.  The Weddings

Having provided no reason for Selma and Tony to meet, the show doesn’t feel the need give their marriage any type of story, meaning or conflict.  Their actual wedding ceremony is just that, a wedding ceremony.  There’s a throwaway joke from Homer, but that’s it.  Even Zombie Simpsons can’t let things proceed with nothing going on at all, however, so they manufacture a spat between Marge and Selma.

The Most Boring Mob Wedding in History

Oh crap, we forget the plot.  Think . . . think . . .

The very brief disagreement between the sisters is ostensibly about Marge and Homer getting a bad table at the reception, but it’s really about the whole Fat Tony-Selma story not having any conflict whatsoever.  Consider that there’s no foreshadowing about the Marge-Selma feud, it crops up completely out of nowhere, and is then resolved just a couple of scenes later as the two of them sit on deck chairs and decide to let bygones be bygones.  Literally nothing happens except that Marge and Selma spontaneously decide “meh, I guess we’re not mad at each other anymore”.

Now consider the (much briefer) wedding in “A Fish Called Selma”.  Obviously, there’s a ceremony and Troy and Selma take their vows (albeit with some comedic twists, “take the fabulous Troy McClure”, etcetera).  But running through the entire scene are two plot threads.  First, Homer has just found out something the audience has known for a while: Troy is only marrying Selma to help his career.  So when Lovejoy asks if anyone has any reason why these two should not be wed, the camera pans to Homer, who has exactly such a reason.  Homer’s reaction?  Silently singing himself Gary Glitter’s stadium rock ballad “Rock and Roll”.  Unlike Homer’s throwaway joke in “The Real Housewives of Fat Tony”, this one has something to do with what’s going on, and requires Homer to be emotionally ignorant rather than knuckle draggingly stupid.

The second way the main story is interwoven into the wedding is through Troy’s behavior.  At the altar, he mugs for the cameras rather than kissing Selma back.  When they reach the car, she talks about how this is the best day of her life but it’s only a “good day” for him.  They kiss right after that, but his eyes are always looking up, making sure that he will indeed be “on every newsstand in the country”.

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Matching pink outfits.  Who says tradition’s on the wane? 

3. The Endings

Since Marge and Selma mutually decide that they don’t care enough about their little disagreement to continue it all the way to the end of the episode, Zombie Simpsons needed to pull something directly out of its ass to reach the sweet relief of twenty minutes runtime.  That something was an infidelity plot which they introduced – with no warning – at the seventeen minute mark.  At that point they’d all but exhausted their supply of the Jersey Shore jokes that were the reason this whole episode got approved in the first place, and they headed for the nearest exit they could find.

The Dukes of Hazzard Think This Is a Bit Much

The ending is forced to (literally) break into the episode.

“A Fish Called Selma” has a twist at the end too.  But instead of a panicked swerve into oncoming traffic that results in the “real wife” driving a convertible through a fence, it’s one of those tightly controlled 180s where the hero throws the car into reverse and shoots all the bad guys while driving backwards.  From the very first time Troy and Selma meet, when he exchanges dinner for a wink and a nod on his driver’s license, it’s been plainly obvious to the audience that Troy is using their relationship to restore his career.  Selma’s mounting levels of denial about this set the episode up for the ending the audience has been conditioned to expect through years of phony romance in television and film: the big confrontation where she realizes that he’s using her and dumps him.

But The Simpsons is far too clever to just go through the motions like that.  Instead, we get this:

Selma: You’re asking me to live a lie, I don’t know if I can do that.
Troy: It’s remarkably easy.  Just smile for the cameras and enjoy Mr. Troy’s Wild Ride.  You’ll go to the right parties, meet the right people.  Sure, you’ll be a sham wife, but you’ll be the envy of every other sham wife in town!  So, what do you say, baby?
Selma: Tell me again about Mr. Troy’s Wild Ride.

No anger.  No outrage.  No yelling about betrayal.  Just two people coming to an agreement.  And even this isn’t totally unexpected.  Way back at the beginning of the episode, when Troy took Selma out for the dinner that started it all, she says, “Thanks for holding up your end of the bargain.  I had a pretty good time.”  Selma isn’t stupid, she knew the dinner was quid pro quo, so it’s not a bolt from the blue when she decides that the marriage can be too.  All the little pieces fit so snugly together that Swiss watchmakers could take lessons.

When the inevitable break up does come, there’s no need for shock or tears or the retcon induced hair pulling that drags “The Real Housewives of Fat Tony” over the finish line.  Selma realizes that Troy is willing to take the sham further than she’s willing to go, and decides to stop things.  It ends on the comically bittersweet note of them going their separate ways, with microwaved roaches for Jub Jub, and an a lunatic vanity project for Professor Horatio Hufnagel.

[Updated because I can’t tell one sporting staple song from another.  Originally I had Homer’s wedding song as this.]


Quote of the Day

Chippendale Carpool

Image used under Creative Commons license from Flickr user istolethetv.

“How come no Chippendales dancers ever come in to renew their licenses?” – Selma Bouvier
“They carpool, that’s the problem.” – Patty Bouvier


Misguided Attention Whores Maul Zombie Simpsons; Also, Katy Perry Was There (Updated)

Chalkboard - The Fight Before Christmas

“Why’d they make that one Muppet out of leather?” – Bart Simpson

Let me start by saying that I thought the first segment, while poorly executed in places, wasn’t terrible.  It wasn’t without its problems, the montage* was pointless, the pacing was skewed, and the show-don’t-tell violation on the reindeer stew spoiled what could’ve been a great joke.  But having Santa, in the person of Krusty no less, run his organization like a particularly inept and heartless multinational corporation (reminiscent of Futurama’s Santa), basically worked.  There were some decent subtle gags (“Unionize” scrawled on the back of the bench, the picture of the snowman guard’s kids), and even a couple of good lines (“But by today’s standards, naughty’s nothing.  I didn’t get anybody pregnant, I didn’t Facebook a kid to death”).  The twist ending was actually appropriate, and Run D.M.C. was a nice touch. 

The rest of it was a shambles, including the strange wraparound story that they dropped like a hot poker when it came time for their big, laugh-tracked finish.  The Martha Stewart segment was a one-joke exercise in repetition, and Lisa’s bit was so bizarre as to be nigh indescribable.  The Inglourious Basterds thing was so out of left field and out of place that I’m not 100% sure its inclusion wasn’t some kind of massive editing error. 

And then, of course, there was the ending.  Rarely has a piece of television missed the mark quite so spectacularly.  And I mean “spectacularly” literally, as in something so striking you can’t look away from it, like a fifty-five car pileup or William Shatner’s spoken word performances.  About the only good thing that can be said about Zombie Simpsons’ puppet segment is that in the pantheon of Christmas related pop culture mistakes, The Star Wars Holiday Special is probably unassailable at #1.  We may, however, have a new candidate for #2. 

The numbers are in, and once again football overruns boosted them.  This week’s preliminary numbers show 9.56 million viewers gritted their teeth and wished the real Muppets were still on teevee, and while TV by the Numbers cautions that these are not final, I don’t have much hope that they’ll drop too far.  I’ll update this when they come in anyway.  Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to try to figure out if there is any way this can be defended as some kind of intentionally bad meta-joke or performance art piece.  I am not optimistic. 

*I am continually amazed at the hallucinogenic potency of television marijuana.  My weed never does that. 

Update 9 December 2010: The final numbers are in and, as I feared, at 9.54 million viewers they barely went down.  On the plus side, it looks like FOX doesn’t have a late national game this week so there shouldn’t be much football overrun. 


Quote of the Day

“That’s right boys! Troy’s back from the gutter and he’s brought someone with with him!” – Troy McClure


Troy McClure Tattoo Suggestions

Stop the Planet of the Apes

“Can I play the piano anymore?” – Troy McClure as George Taylor
“Of course you can!” – Dr. Zaius
“Well I couldn’t before!” – Troy McClure as George Taylor

We got an e-mail the other day from reader R H who is considering getting a Troy McClure tattoo.  The current plan is to get Troy in “Stop the Planet of the Apes, I Want to Get Off!” as you can see at right.  The e-mail wanted to know if we had any better ideas for a good Troy McClure image.  Obviously, Troy was in some memorable costumes over the years, but I couldn’t think of anything better than the Charlton Heston spacesuit.  (Bonus points for all of Hartman’s Heston impersonations over the years.) 

So, anyone got any ideas?  I don’t think you can add images in the comments, but if anyone has one, e-mail it to us and I’ll add it to this post.  Oh, and we have been promised pictures once the ink goes on. 


Quote of the Day

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“Hi, I remember you from such film strips as ‘Locker Room Towel Fight: The Blinding of Larry Driscoll’.” – Lisa Simpson
“You know, I was one of the first to speak out against horse play.” – Troy McClure


Doing Less with More

“Hi, I’m Troy McClure.  You may remember me from such films as ‘The Greatest Story Ever Hulaed’ and ‘They Came to Burgle Carnegie Hall’.” – Troy McClure

In three weeks there will be a Zombie Simpsons episode titled “The Greatest Story Ever D’ohed”.  This is, obviously, a play on “The Greatest Story Ever Told”, the 1965 Charlton Heston movie about Jebus.  It goes almost without saying that The Simpsons already did a pun on that movie, way back in Season 7 (“A Fish Called Selma”) when Troy McClure uttered the quote above.  Let’s compare and contrast. 

The Simpsons took a famous movie and used it to make a joke (and it wasn’t even the only joke in that line), and when they did so they came up with something original.  Zombie Simpsons recycled a joke, mindlessly inserted a catchphrase, and made the lackluster result the title of the entire episode.  Or, to put it another way, The Simpsons crammed creativity into a tiny part of their episode, Zombie Simpsons took a shortcut and used it more prominently.  If you’re going to go over ground that’s already been covered you could at least put a little effort into it, is all I’m saying. 

(Note: Assuming you don’t count the Shary Bobbins episode the first time “D’oh” was ever used in an episode title was Season 10.  Counting the one in three weeks they’ll have used it seven times since then.  Zombie Simpsons can’t even gin up original puns.) 


Quote of the Day


“Troy! Mac Parker.  Ever hear of… Planet of the Apes?” – MacArthur Parker

“Uh… the movie, or the planet?” – Troy McClure

“The brand new, multimillion dollar musical.  And you, are starring, as the human.” – MacArthur Parker

“It’s the part I was born to play, baby!” – Troy McClure


“New Kids on the Blecch” Makes Baby Jesus Cry

A Fish Called Selma2
“That took a lot of class.” – Troy McClure

I had genuinely forgotten just how bad some of these Season 12 episodes are.  I remember when this boy band episode was first broadcast, and I remember hating it, but I’d forgotten how painfully long it is.  And I know it clocks in at the usual amount of time, but the third act of this one is terribly boring, even by the standards of Zombie Simpsons.  There’s a concert on the ship, then it sails to New York, then they blow up the Mad Magazine building for some reason and it just keeps on going to the point that it feels like it’s never going to end.  Oh yeah, and “‘N Sync” shows up to be fawned over instead of mocked.  Just a truly awful spectacle.

Anyway, there are a whopping eleven people commenting on this one, including one from ‘N Sync.

1:15:  Mike Scully had to yell at the writers for not coming up with any good ideas and this piece of shit was the result.

3:15:  Discussing how star struck everyone was to have ‘N Sync around.

4:45:  Still talking about how popular ‘N Sync was.

5:20:  Laughing at the stupidity of their band notification joke.

6:30:  Now they’re discussing how all of the ‘N Sync songs sounded the same.

7:45:  Discussing how the guy they got to produce the crappy songs was an asshole to the singers they brought in.  The purpose, of course, was to get that authentic boy band sound that really made this episode oh so special.

8:20:  Discussing how faithfully their crappy fake boy band singing imitates actual crappy boy band singing.  Seriously.

9:30:  In keeping with the other Season 12 DVD commentaries, this is the part where they laugh about how strange and bizarre the plot of this episode is.

11:40:  Discussing the fact that they had no ending for this episode, somebody says, “It was during a period when a lot of conspiracies were afoot on the show.  When people weren’t what they seemed.”  Basically that means that they didn’t have an ending for this half-cooked story and just pulled something out of their asses.  What’s more, they did that a lot.  Yet again, the apathy towards the quality of their own show is really telling.

12:40:  Talking about an ‘N Sync concert.

13:10:  Someone mockingly calls the story “airtight” to general laughter.  They just don’t care.

13:20:  Discussing whether or not the Village People were an inspiration for this insane Navy conspiracy ploy, “That’s way more thought than we put into it.”  Yup.

15:40:  “Another great song”.  Seriously, half this episode is bad imitations of worse songs, and these guys are thoroughly entertained by it.

18:00:  Long story from ‘N Sync guy about the perils of lip syncing.

19:30:  Lip syncing story still going on.

19:50:  Laughing at the wild stupidity of having ‘N Sync show up for no reason.

20:35:  Mildly interesting note in that they had to pull this episode from syndication for a while after the 2001 terrorist attacks because they blew up a building in New York.

21:12:  Laughing at the Irish cop and what they’re doing on a moving boat.  I’ll say it again: utter apathy towards their work, just the textbook definition of phoning something in.


Quote of the Day

A Fish Called Selma1

“You’re asking me to live a lie, I don’t know if I can do that.” – Selma McClure

“It’s remarkably easy!” – Troy McClure


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