Posts Tagged ‘Radio Bart


Quote of the Day

Radio Bart19

“Sorry, Rosarita, I gotta get to my birthday party.” – Bart Simpson
“Farewell, senor Bart.” – Rosarita

Happy birthday, Maggie Roswell!


Quote of the Day


“What the?” – Bart Simpson
“It’s a label maker.” – Patty Bouvier
“We have one at home.  Before we got it I was always finding Patty’s stubble in my leg razor.” – Selma Bouvier
“Eeehh.” – Bart Simpson

Sorry for the late post.  We got some real good toy commercials coming up.  I promise.


Quote of the Day

Radio Bart18

“You know, Marge, Bart’s really gonna like my birthday present this year.  It won’t be like those shoe trees I got him last year, or the shelf paper I bought him for Christmas.  I’ll buy his love yet.” – Homer Simpson

Happy birthday Al Jean!


Quote of the Day

Radio Bart17

“Ever since I called for the rescue of that Simpson lad, I have taken a lot of heat.  So, I am flip-flopping!  I say: let him stay down there!” – Mayor Quimby
“Yay!” – Crowd


Behind Us Forever: Diggs & The Man Who Grew Too Much

Diggs and Man Who Grew Too Much Chalkboard

“Grasping the child firmly in his talons, Socrates here will fly him to safety.  Just watch . . . I don’t think he’s coming back.” – Falconry Guy 

First we got a nice long break from Zombie Simpsons, and then they made their triumphant return by dropping two great big steaming piles back-to-back.  The first one, “Diggs”, is among the more tone deaf episodes I can recall in a while.  It’s about a mentally ill kid who likes falcons and then gets hauled off to a loony bin for the rest of his life.  They play it for sad, but it’s so stupid and nonsensical that I couldn’t register anything more than bemusement.

The second was a Sideshow Bob episode where he’s a scientist.  In a turn that nobody could or should have seen coming, he’s also a genetically enhanced superman who throws himself off a dam for some reason.  Plus there were a bunch of teenagers in a church abstinence program that made no sense for them to be in.  They also briefly fought Sideshow Bob for some other reason.

– The couch gag, by Sylvain Chomet (a/k/a the Triplets of Belleville guy), was kinda interesting and managed to eat 60 seconds.  It’s all gonna be downhill from here.

– They should’ve made the couch gag longer.  The first two scenes, one in church the other a montage of Homer asking Bart to repay his $20, were pure filler.

– And now Bart is eating things for money, including a dead frog that Jimbo just happened to have on the playground.  Does any of this make sense?  Of course not!  It doesn’t even make sense within this scene, as Jimbo comes along offering Bart the full $20 he needs, making the rest of it pointless.

– Okay, having the Potter boy says “Habemus Papam” after the falcon craps was kinda funny.

– But is immediately followed by a Quahog style quick cut to Homer yelling at the dog to sit.

– “I wasn’t drinking, I was learning that nature isn’t a complete waste of space”, “That doesn’t sound like you”, “But it does sound like the kind of lie you’d make up after the first time you got blitzed”.  Telling us what we just saw, then telling us what we already know, and then returning to a joke that had already gone on way too long.  It’s hard to imagine how the writing on this should could get any worse.

– And how about some falconry montage?  Hey, at least there’s no dialogue!

– That’s right, Krusty’s just standing out in a field without his nose.  Carry on.

– Nice of the kid to just leap off the tree and get the plot moving.

– Why is Homer caring for the bird?  Better question: why am I asking?

– “I never heard of this new hospital, so I looked it up and printed it out” – Ah, there’s the pointless exposition that had been absent for almost twenty seconds.

– They’re really being weird about the fact that the kid is going to a mental hospital.  Like, that’s where their story is sending them, but they won’t even mention what it is at this dinner table scene.  It’s idiocy through a weird combination of sensitivity and insensitivity.

– “I obtained the pass to enter the Springfield falconry contest, which is what Freedom and I were training for when we first met you.” – This one sentence neatly encapsulates the entire mess that is this episode.  This comes with less than three minutes to go, but is the first mention of the “falconry contest” that makes up the ending.  It requires a nonsensical “one day pass” from the mental institute to which they haphazardly committed this (apparently parent-less) kid.  And it negates pretty much everything we’ve seen with this kid up to this point since none of it had any bearing on what he wanted to do.

–  The falcons are free.  And now he’s going back to the mental institute . . . on his bike which he has for some reason.

– And then Milhouse appears from nowhere to try and salvage the uber-downer of an ending.

What a complete and utter mess of an episode, and even they knew it.  (Why else would they dump it at 7:30?)  They got themselves in way over their heads with the lonesome schizophrenic kid, sent him to a nut house, then had to walk back their own story to wrap things up.  Meanwhile, Bart went through a wide range of short term emotions that also made no sense.  Then it ends with the family at dinner eating duck as the big pre-credits joke . . . which leads back to the sad piano music they played over the doomed and now incarcerated kid.  I don’t know what that was supposed to be, and I’m not sure they did either.  Whatever, it’s time for round two:

– A short couch gag, haven’t seen that in a while.

– So Taco Tuesday comes every week but kills Willie?  Remember when the stampede was just for PE signup day?

– This is the last episode with Marcia Wallace’s voice.  They give her a nice send off at the end, showing her happy with Ned.  I can’t be the only one who finds that completely spoiled by having Lunchlady Doris voice some utterly unnecessary lines at the beginning.

– “Helen Lovejoy is posting the spring volunteer sign up sheet, in five minutes every good task will be taken.” – Maybe they did remember PE signup day.  They certainly remembered “tell the audience what’s happening” day.

– Thrill to the crossing the street scene!

– There is no plausible reason for these kids to be in a church abstinence program.  But these are the teenagers they have in the cast, so in the abstinence program they shall be.

– Since we’re apparently feeling the loss of dead cast members in this one, this fake YouTube video really could’ve used Phil Hartman.  It’d still probably be bad, but it wouldn’t be this bad.

– It really is too much to ask for a single scene to make sense.  After the video, Lisa wants to run off to do research on a topic that she knew enough to call a PTA meeting about?  The mind reels.

– That GMO buffet went nice and quick.

– I don’t remember which episode it was that had people’s faces falling off, but it sure deserved a callback.

– Why would Marge think finger puppets(!) would help explain things to teenagers?

– Now Homer’s at the abstinence meeting for some reason.

– Hey, a plot point just literally fell on Lisa only to have Sideshow Bob demonstrate his superhuman strength by saving her.

– Bob tossed off his concrete block now instead of earlier because . . .?

– “And we’re scared of that because . . . “, then Bob explains.  Whew.

– They’re on top of a dam now.  No idea why, but they are.

– “We’re here to stop you” is Marge’s line right as she and the teens pull up from nowhere to confront Bob.  (Well, Marge pulls up in the car, the teens just appear.)  It’s expository and nonsensical, so at least that fits with the rest of the episode.  Everything else about the ending?  Not so much.

– Bob just jumped off the dam, remembered he had gills, and stepped on a rake underwater.  I’ve said this before and I’ll probably say it again, but this is fan service at the lowest common denominator.

In that interview with Jean I linked on Friday, he mentioned why they don’t do more Sideshow Bob episodes:

“I’m really, really careful about approving new Sideshow Bob episodes, because I think every one of them is so special, and I never want to feel like we’re burning the character out,”

You made him a genetic superman with fucking gills!  Could some reporter on his next conference call ask him what “burning the character out” would look like?  Would he have to become a cyborg?  Travel to another dimension?  What’s left?

Anyway, the ratings are in and they are the worst ever, both of them.  The awkward and unwatchable mental kid episode at 7:30 had just 2.65 million viewers wonder why he didn’t have any parents.  The Sideshow-Bob-Has-Superpowers-Now episode made just 3.73 million viewers wonder what they hell they just watched.  That’s good for places #1 and #2 on the all time least watched list.


Quote of the Day

Radio Bart16

“Don’t worry, son.  Just cause you’re trapped in a hole doesn’t mean you can’t live a rich and full life.  I brought you your Krusty doll.” – Homer Simpson
“Ow!  Knock it off you bald boob!” – Bart Simpson
“Hey, don’t make me come down there!” – Homer Simpson
“I’d like to see you fit!” – Bart Simpson


Reading Digest: Celebrities Behaving Well Edition

Radio Bart15

“But this isn’t about show business, this is about some kid down a hole, or something.  And we’ve all got to do what we can.” – Sting

Dead Homer Society is coming at you live from my new and pointlessly overpowered PC; the laptop is dead, long live the laptop.  (Windows 8 is not nearly as terrible as advertised once you install Classic Shell so it can actually work with a mouse and keyboard.  Jebus, Microsoft, do you enjoy creating headaches for yourselves and everyone else?)  This week we’ve got two Simpsons mainstays both being their naturally awesome selves, one by being nice to a fan, the other by cross dressing.  Try to guess which, I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised.  We’ve also got three links to long and thoughtful articles about the show.  There’s one about the “Terror at 5 1/2 Feet” Halloween segment, one about “Marge Be Not Proud”, and one about how the show can’t string a story together anymore.  In addition to all that, we’ve got some awesome fan made Bart shoes, a newfangled bootleg t-shirt, a fantastic rendition of the theme song, and some excellent usage.


The Simpsons Theme Song – Smooth Charlie’s Link of the Week is this epically excellent one-man, multi-instrument rendition of the theme song:

He even did the elongated circus version complete with whistle!  Well done.

The One Where Bart Sells His Soul – Self examination through The Simpsons:

In the past few years there has been a rekindling of the relationship I once had with my spirit. One of my treasured activities is going on long walks where I find peace in my thoughts. I also enjoy time spent with friends and family. When I caught The Simpsons re-run it was an epiphany. “That was it,” I thought, “that was exactly how it felt”.

Comic collage – Exactly what it says.  There’s quite a few Simpsons characters mixed in with everything from the Smurfs and Peanuts to stuff I don’t recognize at all.

Games Go To Hollywood: The Simpsons, “Marge Be Not Proud” – An article about how “Marge Be Not Proud” showcases something new in Bart, from which I’d like to highlight two things:

Bart Simpson is the quintessential bad kid. He talks back to his teachers, picks on his sister, and (at least in early seasons of The Simpsons) he’s quick to tell any figure of authority, “Don’t have a cow, man.”

Among the many, many things Zombie Simpsons has lost is Bart’s reflexive disdain for authority.  It just isn’t something they do anymore because Bart, like Homer and many others, seems to understand now that there are no consequences and that he can get away with anything.  Which leads to this:

Bart realizes that he’s capable of stealing—capable of carrying out a bad act. And of all the things to take, he chooses a video game. He’s using his newfound nefarious powers to grasp desperately for an escape. The powers work, but the escape doesn’t happen. For a minute, this bad kid realizes he’s bad.

And while that’s all well and good for character development and hugging, it’s a real departure from what the show used to be.  The whole thing’s worth a read. 

pale division: bart simpson – More high fashion clothes with Bart on them.

In Character: Krusty the Clown – Speaking of fashion, here are the high end clothes you’d need to dress just like Krusty.  Presumably the nicotine patch is sold separately.

Terror At 5 1/2 Feet – Discussing “Treehouse of Horror IV”’s middle segment:

I love the role of Principal Skinner in this Treehouse of Horror piece as well – he borders humourously on Nurse Ratched territory at times. “I’ve gotten word that a child’s using his imagination, and I’ve come to put a stop to it,” is one select quote. “Right or wrong, young man, your behaviour was disruptive. Perhaps spending the remainder of your life in a mad house will teach you some manners,” is another one that hits the spot particularly well.

And perhaps that’s the most chilling thing about this story. Firstly, that Bart’s apparent madness was in fact rational, revealing everybody else’s sane desire to remain calm as totally irrational given the circumstances. That’s ultimately what he gets sent to a mental institution for as well: disturbing the routine way of things rather than actually being mentally ill. Oh, how the mental health care sector has a chequered past in that regard which The Simpsons, as ever, satirises brilliantly.

Classic Halloween segments tend to get more disturbing the more you think about them. 

Dan Castellaneta – Good dude, that Dan Castellaneta:

I mailed a drawing (with stamped return envelope and request letter) to Dan Castellaneta on December 13, 2012.
It was signed and mailed back to me on Saturday, February 2, 2013; 51 days later.

Click through for a picture of the (now signed) drawing.

February 4 – Lounge Lizard #2 – A list of great fictional bars includes Moe’s.

36/365 – Fantastic fan photo of three Homer figurines all lined up and lit well.

Universal and IOA Update for February! – More information about the construction being done around the Simpsons ride down in America’s wang (emphasis in original):

Last September, I started seeing rumor mill about The International Food and Wine Festival restaurant closing to make way for a new Simpsons themed eatery. Well rumor turned to truth and then grew to rumor…AND EXPLODED!!! Now we sit at beginning of February and all sorts of construction is going on. Rumor mill says you have this to look forward to: The Krusty Burger, Moe’s Tavern, Kentucky Fried Panda, New Simpsons Flat Ride near MIB, and Other Facades.

Springfield, here I come – Man decides to rewatch the whole series:

The Simpsons has always been one of my favorite shows, and I know I’ve missed a ton of the more recent ones. I’m especially excited because there are so many pop-culture references in the show that I’m sure I didn’t get the first time through as a kid. I really think watching through them again is going to be a blast.

Sounds fun, though my strong advice would be to quit sometime early in the double digit seasons.  Nobody needs to torment themselves like that.

My Rejected Scripts #3: Deadli-er Catch – A fake show pitch ends with a related Simpsons reference to poor Pinchy the lobster.

How to draw Krusty the Clown from The S – A step by step tutorial for MS Paint (or something similar).

Album Review: Alice Russell/To Dust – Not that we needed any, but further proof that Harry Shearer is as fantastic as it is humanely possible to be:

(Check the video for the single on YOUtube. It stars long-time Russell fan Harry Shearer from The Simpsons and Spinal Tap, and is a beautifully touching little vignette/short story. Worth a watch all the way through, you ADHD kidz).

I have now seen Mr. Burns put on makeup and pad his bra.  The look on his face when room service shows up is hilarious. 

Broadcasters take The Simpsons short film – “The Longest Daycare” is coming to TVs in Britain, France and here in the States.

The Simpsons: Tapped Out finally available in Google Play – The Tapped Out game is now available for Android.  That is all.

El Barto sneakerz – Fan made El Barto shoes.  Bravo.

[News] Jung Yonghwa’s Playful Homer Simpson Impression Selca – This is a fan site for a Korean band that I’ve never heard of, but their lead singer apparently likes him some Homer.

D’oh!: Driver with parking boot apparently asks, ‘What would Homer Simpson do?’ – Yeah, there’s a reason you’re not supposed to drive with the boot on.

Play game Lisa Simpson Dress Up Flash online free games at – I can’t entirely recommend you click on this as it is a hacktacular flash “game” where all you do is click through different outfits and accessories for a completely static image of Lisa.  I just find it amusing because the background music is the piano song from the old Incredible Hulk TV show.  It’s such an odd confluence of unlicensed pop culture.

Movie Review: No 74. Cinema Paradiso – Excellent reference:

To me, however, the job of the filmmaker is to effectively tell a story, and I really feel like we were let down on that one. Fundamentally, it’s a great story, but there is so much going on (much of which is irrelevant to the story) that it loses its cohesion and starts seeming less like a good film and more like an “onion on my belt” rant.


2 meals 1 Chicken – Excellent usage:

So what do you do when you open your fridge and all you see is –

  • 2 limes
  • half an onion, 1 jalapeño
  • and a delicious local organic chicken from Richardson Farms Rockdale, Tx (purchased at in.gredients my fav grocery store)

I’ll tell you what – you MacGyver 2 delicious paleo meals *no need for paper clip, ballpoint pen, or tweezers


“Don’t thank me. Thank the moon’s gravitational pull”

Editor’s Chair: Let’s Destroy the Sun – A Simpsons based cure for writer’s block:

A friend of mine–and one of my favorite pessimists–has said that she cures writer’s block by placing one simple sentence at the top of her page and going from there.  So here goes:

Since the dawn of time, man has yearned to destroy the sun.

There.  Maybe that will help…

Couldn’t hurt.

Sleaze Factor – Most of the “black Bart” bootleg t-shirts are from the dawn of the show, but this is brand new.  Cool.

Super Bowl XLVII…In 10 Words – What you got riding on this game?  My daughter.  Whew, what a gambler.

RuPaul’s Drag Race…In 10 Words – At last, an excuse to wear makeup!

Bullet To The Head…In 10 Words – If you want results, you’ve got to go to the Schwarzeneggers, the Stallones, and, to a lesser extent, the Van Dammes.

Why being a Vegetarian DOES NOT mean you are Healthy – We’ll never know just how many real life vegetarians were influenced by “Lisa the Vegetarian”, but it’s lot:

I’m 31 years old now and I’ve been a vegetarian since I was in 6th grade or so.  There were certainly different degrees of vegetarianism as I got older and as I learned more about what that really meant.

I have to admit that when I saw the episode of the Simpsons when Lisa became a vegetarian I felt her pain.

I came from a household that was strictly meat and potatoes.  And that may be why I became the type of “vegetarian” that I did at an early age.

What is the Appeal of The Simpsons? – This is dead-on correct, and it’s no coincidence that all the examples she cites are Zombie Simpsons:

I mean, it’s not the inconsistencies of characters (In ‘Please Homer Don’t Hammer ‘Em’, Bart is revealed allergic to shrimp. Who knew?) or the amount of injuries sustained over the years that are never mentioned. The writers probably do this to mock one thing or another, as is often good about The Simpsons.

It’s the fact that, as writers, it promotes flimsy plotting and a ‘happy ending’ that real life cannot give. It gives watchers the wrong idea that something can be fixed like that *clicks fingers* and gives non-writers the idea that all stories must end on a high note.

When The Simpsons was still itself, they always had a way of ending that was both happy and still mean and/or cynical, like Bart and Homer taunting Nelson after the soap box derby race, Selma describing Jub Jub as a “little version of me”, and Maggie calling Homer “Daddy” when he’s out of the room and can’t hear her.  These days?  Not so much.

Looking Ahead To A Fourth Season Of Community – And finally, an aside about Community agrees with us:

I’ve written before about 30 Rock, Parks & Rec, and Community.  For a while there, I had a real hard time distinguishing between the three which one was my favorite.  Usually, it was whatever show I’d seen most recently.  But, with less-than-stellar 6th and 7th seasons, I’d say 30 Rock has diminished in my eyes (much the same way the Simpsons fell from grace after season 9).

Fell from grace, I like that. 


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