28
Jan
09

End the Simpsons #2 – Think of the Children!

“Hey, when I was your age fifty cents was a lot of money.” – Homer Simpson

“Really?” – Bart Simpson
“Nah.” – Homer Simpson

One of the many horrible side effects of the fact that there hasn’t been a genuine Simpsons episode in more than a decade is that we are now raising a generation of Simpsons cripples.  Anyone born after the late 1980s didn’t become old enough to really appreciate the show until well after it’d fallen on hard times.  These days even the syndication runs are so polluted with Zombie Simpsons and its semi-lifeless forbearers that a decent appreciation of the classics needs to be deliberately sought out or instilled.  

For example, I have a bunch of nieces and nephews ranging in age from six to thirteen; they all like watching The Simpsons.  But they have a hard time distinguishing real Simpsons from Zombie Simpsons.  When I get out my laptop at family gatherings and queue up some of the classics they’ll sit there, riveted to the screen, and laugh out loud.  They TiVo the syndicated episodes at home, but until I started showing them the original seasons they had hardly seen any of those episodes.  To them, The Simpsons is just another television show; there was never a time in their lives when it stood head and shoulders above everything else.  
Of course, the last thing any kid wants to hear from a grown up is some variation of, “In my day . . . we walked uphill to school/folks was tougher/Simpsons didn’t suck.”  I haven’t found a way to break through that; maybe there isn’t one.  That would be a pity because it would mean that the existence of Zombie Simpsons not only tarnishes a part of my upbringing, but it spoils what should be a cultural treasure for them as well.  
I’m not too worried though; as they get older they’ll be able to tell shit from Shinola.  


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