Reading Digest: Refusing to Play Along Edition

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Image used under Creative Commons license from Flickr user Salim Virji.

“I think stealing cable is wrong.  So I’m choosing not to watch it in the hope that others will follow my example.  It’s the last you’ll hear from me on the matter.  Thank you for your time.” – Lisa Simpson

We’re no strangers to traffic whoring here at the Dead Homer Society.  (Will Pornography Monday return this summer?  You get two guesses, but you’re only going to need one.)  But even I have my limits, and this week there are some things I’m boycotting completely and not linking.  The first is a World Cup video Nike made to showcase their stable of athletes; Homer’s in it for a split second and I couldn’t care less.  The second is the numerous radio station “blogs” that put up a screen capture of Zombie Simpsons’ Lost related chalkboard item this week.  I put blogs in quotes because many of these sites are identical (same text, same image, same layout), they’re just for different radio stations that are, no doubt, owned by the same conglomerate.  Remember what Mad Jon said about the DJ 3000 being real?  Well those carbon copy web pages are what the DJ 3000 looks like on the internet.  Also, Entertainment Weekly put Homer on their cover, but their website is so poorly designed that I’m not even going to bother.   Hmmm, maybe I’m still grumpy from seven straight weeks of new Zombie Simpsons?  Nah.  Of course, we’ve also got some excellent usage (much in relation to series finales), some poor usage, some art, and an escape from video game damnation. 


9th drawing: Baby Bart Simpson – This is a rather hypnotic YouTube of someone drawing Bart as a baby.  There are a few others in the series.

How to draw Maggie Simpson – Maybe I’m the only one who likes watching people draw things, but I find these fascinating. 

Cubee – Ned Flanders – If I were allowed to use scissors I’d try and make this.  Awesome. 

10 Famous Wingmen – Milhouse is on here.  Other than that, quite lame. 

To Paraphrase The Simpsons – Excellent usage:

Bart – "Dad, why did you take me to a gay logging camp?"

Homer – "I don’t know!"

Click through for the picture that explains it. 

Grill with Homer Simpson – Not really, but grilling season is coming up.  Good Morning Burger, anyone?

Connecting with Games: The Simpsons Arcade Trip – Jean-Paul Sartre’s most famous work is a play about eternal torment.  Some clever screenwriter needs to update it so that instead of “Hell is other people”, it’s “Hell is unfinished video games”.  It’s good to see someone got over the hump on the original Simpsons game.  Also, Homer does kind of have his face in Marge’s crotch on that cover image.  Mmmm, vagina.  (via)

The Simpsons Quotes – I didn’t verify these, but they look pretty good. 

The Simpsons Cartoon Studio – I can’t believe I’ve never heard of this before, but it looks terrible. 

Simon’s Final Judgment – This is mostly about Simon Cowell and isn’t worth your time, I’d just like to point out the opening:

Say whatever you like about the folks at Fox: they know how to promote – and cross-promote – their shows.

The season finale of "The Simpsons" served as a virtual commercial for Wednesday’s season finale of "American Idol."

Yes, yes it did. 

Cow and bundle, mom! – An awesome picture of a crappy bootleg Bart doll. 

BP’s slick responses – Look, I’m as pissed off at BP and company as anyone.  Their negligence has caused the biggest, most damaging, and longest lasting environmental disaster in American history.  That said, it’s no excuse for poor usage:

It is bad enough to have the top executives of the involved parties (BP, Halliburton, and Transocean) come before Federal authorities in a commission hearing and do their Bart Simpson-like “It wasn’t me” avoidance of responsibility routine.

“It wasn’t me”?  Barney got is closer on Bart Chat when he said “I didn’t do nothing.”  The real line is, of course, “I didn’t do it.” 

Dove + Simpsons, Flintstones, Jetsons & Scooby Doo – This is not in English, and Google Translate did a more incoherent job than usual, but you don’t need to read it.  It’s pictures of some shampoo ad featuring cartoon women, Marge, Jane, Wilma, and Velma. 

“Lisa, You’re Not Sprinkling Your Sparkles” – Lisa rules, we all know this.  But only in the 90s.  Now?  Not so much. 

Thoughts on Endings: Lost, Infinite Seriality, The Illusion of Change, and What It All Has to Do With Literary Fiction – My apathy towards Lost is close enough to total that I don’t care enough to give this sentence a proper ending.  But this . . .

Maybe it’s because of this quote from the immortal Poochie episode of The Simpsons: “The thing is, there’s not really anything wrong with the Itchy & Scratchy show, it’s as good as ever. But after so many years, the characters just can’t have the same impact they once had.”

. . . is excellent usage, and that I care about. 

24 8.23-24: The last day of our acquaintance24 was always way too unintentionally funny for me to get into it, but this, in regards to the series finale, is excellent usage:

Ah, well. It’s over. As Marge Simpson once said, when Homer wasn’t sure if a problem was properly resolved, “It’s an ending. That’s enough.”

Perfectly quoted and very apt. 

Top 10 TV Shows That Overstayed Their Welcome – This was on Springfield Springfield’s Twitter feed.  Yes, yes, yes:

The show grew a life of itself and just started taking from anything it could get… including itself. It started relying on just what South Park made of fun Family Guy for: pop culture references instead of jokes. Satire turned into spoof, turned into lampoon and the real base of the show, the core died with the lack of creativity that’s plastered onto some of our favorite characters week after week.

Rot in hell, Zombie Simpsons.

6 Responses to “Reading Digest: Refusing to Play Along Edition”

  1. 28 May 2010 at 3:21 pm

    Thanks for the link, and great blog! I’m currently revisiting my old Simpsons obsession and I’m getting in deep.

    And yeah, the Simpsons Cartoon Studio was pretty bad.

  2. 2 Lovejoy Fan
    28 May 2010 at 5:18 pm

    I used to own “The Simpsons Cartoon Studio” and yes, it was terrible.

  3. 28 May 2010 at 10:26 pm

    Was it true the lips didn’t even move?

  4. 4 sVybDy
    29 May 2010 at 12:40 am

    Having had a copy of Simpsons Cartoon Studio at one point, I’m trying to recall if they did or didn’t. What I know for sure is that you selected from a series of canned animations to use, and if those canned animations didn’t feature moving mouths, then tough luck.

  5. 5 D.N.
    29 May 2010 at 2:18 am

    That crappy bootleg Bart doll is indeed awesome. It looks like the person set out to make Bart, suddenly decided to make it Homer, then just plain gave up.

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