Crazy Noises: Bart Star

Bart Star1

“Team sports’ll keep you away from temptations like rock music and girls.” – Ned Flanders
“Yay!” – Rod & Todd Flanders

There’s no new Zombie Simpsons until September at the earliest (October? fingers crossed!), so we’re going to spend the summer overthinking Season 9.  Why Season 9?  Because we did Season 8 last summer, and Season 9 was when the show started becoming more Zombie than Simpsons.  Since we’re too lazy to do audio and too ugly to do video, we’ve booked a “chatroom” (ours is right between the one with the sexy seventh graders and the one with the bored federal agents pretending to be sexy seventh graders).  So log on to your dial-up AOL and join us.  This text has been edited for clarity and spelling (especially on “primus inter pares”).

Mad Jon: I am not such a fan of this episode.

Dave: I’m going to guess that’s true for all of us.

Charlie Sweatpants: Ah ha: (slight) disagree!

Dave: I’m shocked, shocked I am.

Charlie Sweatpants: This episode strikes me as a marginally weaker version of the one we were just talking about.

Mad Jon: I think this one has a few more fundamental flaws.

Charlie Sweatpants: Most of the bad stuff is Jerkass Homer related, there’s just a little bit more in this episode than there is in "Cartridge Family".

Damn, we agreed.

Dave: Who is this generous Charlie and what has he done with the vitriolic, evil Charlie?

Mad Jon: Did you drink two nights of rum rations today Pants?

Charlie Sweatpants: I’m plenty vitriolic, and I’ve got plenty to work with here:

Homer’s pointless call to the talk radio show sucks.

King of the Hill makes a guest appearance for no fucking reason whatsoever.

And the "cut" joke should never have taken more than a single scene.

I have bubonic loathing for all those things.

However, there are a number of jokes I enjoy, primus inter pares, Skittle-brau.

Dave: Ugh, King of the Hill.

Mad Jon: Skittle-brau is funny

Dave: Hell yes.

Mad Jon: More issues: Ned not being Ned, pointless celebrity appearance

Charlie Sweatpants: But there’s more, Marge’s joke about the persistent tick, Bart’s "This thing only takes dollars" about video games, and Bart’s "gotta be a trick, run like the wind" thing about Homer trying to hug him,

All of those are good.

Yeah, the Namath thing was definitely a canary in the coal mind kinda things.

Mad Jon: I did like Homer’s flashback to gymnastics, and Grandpa’s retort to Marge’s question about pride for his son

Charlie Sweatpants: Again, those are good.

Mad Jon: In addition to Homer being a Jerkass, there were several lessons he "learned" in this episode as well.

Charlie Sweatpants:   Oh, the learned lessons suck.

The real problem with this episode is that it’s kind of a "Lisa on Ice" rehash, and they fill in the gaps with Jerkass Homer.

Mad Jon: That’s a good way to put it.

Charlie Sweatpants: That Homer would belittle Ned as the coach is great, that he would do it in front of everyone was not.

When he starts chanting "Flanders", that’s kinda funny, but then he throws a beer can at him, and . . . not so much.

Mad Jon: I’m surprised Marge could even get him to go to the game.

Charlie Sweatpants: Good point.

Dave: So they get close to the line, stare at it, and then cross it.

Charlie Sweatpants: Pretty much, the guys behind "Whacking Day" tossed a whisky bottle over it, but by alluding to it they made it funnier.

Homer hates Ned, sure, but he’s not going to throw a full can at him, much less one filled with beer.

Mad Jon: That’s good drinkin’ beer.

I also really enjoy the Lisa scene where she tries to find a fault with the pee wee football.

Dave: Yep.

Charlie Sweatpants: It’s much like her diagnosis of the Second Amendment.

Mad Jon: Especially the part about the donation to amnesty international, that’s pretty funny.

Charlie Sweatpants: There aren’t a lot of football players on the Simpsons writing staff, but they know that football is too loved to suffer from their complaints.

What, I think, makes this one weaker than "Cartridge Family" is that while Jerkass Homer is the primary problem with both, this one has a tendency to drag it’s jokes out a little more.

From the men’s gymnastics, to the cholesterol level at the beginning, to overly long follow up to Bart’s "run like the wind" there are several good ideas that go on too long.

Mad Jon: They weren’t trying to do much else with this one other than have Homer being a jerk.

There wasn’t enough else going on to support the crap like in Cartridge Family.

But this is a slippery slope upon which we tread.

Charlie Sweatpants: We both know it was downhill from here, but going back to what I said above, I try not to hold the later episodes against these.

This was the era when I tended to like episodes more on a second or third viewing when the shock value of the bad stuff had worn out.

Dave: I’m still not on board with that logic. How can you not hold later episodes against these?

These form the shaky foundation upon which the house of cards was built.

Charlie Sweatpants: Ah, but it also wasn’t their fault.

The credits tell the tale, there are a lot of new names in 9, but there are also a lot of familiar ones.

Mad Jon: I must be missing your point. I hate older episodes much more than these, but I also can’t compare these to earlier season. Also I always look for the missing links, and when I finds em I gets angry.

Charlie Sweatpants: By a season or two from now there are hardly any names in the credits left from the before time, the long long ago.

I guess my point is that I tend to latch on to the good parts, and it’s only once those are all but gone that I really don’t watch them.

Also, "No-Please-Bart-Don’t" is classic Milhouse, and always makes me laugh.

Mad Jon: I don’t have anything else to say about this episode. It was worse than the Cartridge Family, there were a few funny lines, but this one doesn’t ever get into my queue.

Dave: Yep, my sentimonies exactly.

2 Responses to “Crazy Noises: Bart Star”

  1. 17 June 2010 at 3:25 pm

    Hey I sorta like the king of the hill joke and the idea that the different fox cartoons compete with each other in pee wee sports. Can you imagine how dragged out that joke would be if it were done today?

  2. 2 Owen
    25 July 2011 at 11:43 pm

    I like King of the Hill. I’ll take it over ZS any day

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