“I want you to take that monkey back so he can be rehabilitated and get a second chance.” – Marge Simpson
“No, no, he’s fine. Go on, Mojo, show Marge your Happy Dance!” – Homer Simpson
There’s no new Zombie Simpsons until September at the earliest (October? fingers crossed!), so we’re going to spend the summer overthinking Season 9. Why Season 9? Because we did Season 8 last summer, and Season 9 was when the show started becoming more Zombie than Simpsons. Since we’re too lazy to do audio and too ugly to do video, we’ve booked a “chatroom” (ours is right between the one with the sexy seventh graders and the one with the bored federal agents pretending to be sexy seventh graders). So log on to your dial-up AOL and join us. This text has been edited for clarity and spelling (especially on “convenience”).
Charlie Sweatpants: This one is mostly good.
Mad Jon: I generally enjoy it.
It’s not 1-6 top caliber, but it is one of the best in season 9.
Charlie Sweatpants: It gets a little carried away with Willie (especially at the end), but other than that it’s very solid.
Mad Jon: The Brockman induced schmaltz is worth the price of admission.
Charlie Sweatpants: They really enjoyed themselves with all those mind fogging reports.
Dave: It’s watchable, yeah.
Mad Jon: I sense a lingering desire to put us in our place, Dave.
Dave: Nah, there’ll be none of that tonight.
It’s not top of 9 for me only because I have fewer in the top than the two of you.
Charlie Sweatpants: What displeases you?
Mad Jon: Yes, tell us.
Dave: As an aside, I had a friend in high school who more or less built a career around foggy news and warm fuzzies. I blame this episode, actually.
Eh, it just doesn’t grab me. The Bart/Lisa rivalry isn’t particularly entertaining… I hate Lindsey Naegle… the Willie stuff got weird. Y’know. That.
Charlie Sweatpants: The only Bart/Lisa thing I didn’t like is how personal Bart takes her thinking he dumb.
He knows he’s dumber than her, he doesn’t care.
Mad Jon: The Willie stuff dragged on for sure, and I agree with Pants on the Lisa/Bart point.
Dave: And for no reason Bart gets massively butthurt and goes on a mission to prove a point that doesn’t matter.
Charlie Sweatpants: But I do like Lindsey Naegle.
Mad Jon: But time wise they weren’t that lengthy and they led to funny lines.
Charlie Sweatpants: Well, he doesn’t really, and I like when he reads the newspaper.
Mad Jon: And of course, Mojo was great.
Dave: Naegle reminds me of too many alpha-bitch types I work with. Therefore I hate her.
Mojo is pretty awesome.
And I enjoyed Homer’s request for a duck.
Mad Jon: It is unfortunate/fortunate that it clouds the Homer – jerkass stuff.
Charlie Sweatpants: How so?
Mad Jon: Homer wasn’t the man we loved from the early seasons in this episode. But because of his behavior Mojo came into my life, so it’s a wash as far as I am concerned.
Non-Homer behavior wears on me very quickly.
Charlie Sweatpants: I see what you mean, but this is so tame for Jerkass Homer that it hardly registers any more.
Mad Jon: True enough, but I don’t have a lot of grey area for that man.
Dave: I agree with Charlie here. Homer’s a jerkass but by modern standards he’s a saint in this episode.
Charlie Sweatpants: I remember distinctly not liking the way Homer acted when this one first aired, now I don’t mind so much. Again the parallel with the declining elderly relative is apt. This was one of his better days.
Dave, to get back to Lindsey Naegle for a moment, if she reminds you of people you work with, shouldn’t that make this funnier?
Dave: It should but it doesn’t.
There isn’t so much parody with her character as there is a mirror.
Mad Jon: You would think so but here we are…
Charlie Sweatpants: She showed up for the first time as the network executive spouting business speak, so you know she was based on all the ladder climbing career nutjobs that show up at a place like FOX the way new teeth show up in a shark.
Dave: Wasn’t this the first cat lady episode too?
Charlie Sweatpants: I think so.
Mad Jon: I’ll take your word for it.
Dave: Again, Wikipedia backs me up here. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eleanor_Abernathy#Crazy_Cat_Lady
Two new female non-characters, how lucky we were.
Er, scratch that.
I’m dead wrong on this one.
Mad Jon: About what?
Dave: I thought this was Naegle’s first appearance; it’s not.
Charlie Sweatpants: Cat Lady is another one of those characters in the Duff Man/Disco Stu mold where it was funny once, kinda funny the second time, and then turned into an actual character.
Another reason to love Naegle: she gave us permission to scratch “proactive” and “paradigm” from the language.
Mad Jon: She is in plenty of Zombie-sodes
Charlie Sweatpants: To this day I avoid using those words.
But Naegle’s a better character than the Cat Lady.
Mad Jon: My boss uses proactive at least 3 times a day.
Dave: I get twitchy if I don’t say paradigm at least once a week.
Charlie Sweatpants: The Cat Lady is one joke, Naegle’s much closer to the show’s better minor characters.
Dave: Well enjoy your Naegle-lovefest.
I still don’t like her one bit.
Mad Jon: Fair enough.
Charlie Sweatpants: I guess if I didn’t like Naegle I would dislike this one, but I don’t so I don’t.
See that? Quadruple negative!
Dave: Mind blown.
Mad Jon: Very creative.
But since I’ve been drinking, it kind of went over my head.
Charlie Sweatpants: Oh wait, “I don’t doubt that if I didn’t like Naegle I would dislike this one, but I don’t so I don’t” Sextuple negative!
Mad Jon: Take THAT you stupid Dean.
Charlie Sweatpants: I watched that one this morning.
Mad Jon: That’s a good one.
Charlie Sweatpants: Before we get sidetracked again, any final thoughts on Girly Edition?
Dave: Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo.
Mad Jon: Are you high too Dave?
Charlie Sweatpants: No, it’s a grammatically correct sentence that uses only one word.
Charlie Sweatpants: It’s kinda-famous.
Mad Jon: Clearly famous.
Maybe I run in the wrong circles.
Charlie Sweatpants: Then again, I dislike things that are grammatically correct, so I’ll hang with Lindsey and Dave can play with his buffaloes.
Seriously, anything else?
Mad Jon: You could have ended that sentence with a preposition or something.
No, nothing from me.
Charlie Sweatpants: I cheated on the preposition test in fifth grade. I still don’t totally understand what one is.