29
Sep
10

Compare & Contrast: Camp Songs

Kamp Krusty5

Someday I may run out of examples of how Zombie Simpsons is watery gruel compared to the hearty, nourishing comedy stew that was The Simpsons, but not today.  I’d like to compare the camp song in “Elementary School Musical” to the one in “Kamp Krusty”.  Both songs take about fifty seconds of screen time, with the one from Zombie Simpsons being a little bit longer.  Here are the complete lyrics of the song from Zombie Simpsons:

Lea Michele: I, I love the elegant pearls you wear.

Cory Monteith: And the starfish shape that constitutes your hair.

Amber Riley: You’ll be staying in cabin twelve

Cory Monteith: And we think that you’ll be very happy there.

All: You’re gonna like arts camp, Lisa.  Marge paid with her debit Visa.

Lisa:  Arts, arts, arts, and education.

Lisa and “All” then repeat their lines for the next twenty five seconds, or half of the time the song takes.  This may be a bit reductive, but let’s count the jokes.  I see one, and only one.  Line by line:

I, I love the elegant pearls you wear. [Not a joke.]

And the starfish shape that constitutes your hair. [Almost a joke, but recycled from Season 7 so it doesn’t count.]

You’ll be staying in cabin twelve [Again, not a joke.]

And we think that you’ll be very happy there.  [See above.]

You’re gonna like arts camp, Lisa.  Marge paid with her debit Visa.  [The one joke.]

Arts, arts, arts, and education.  [Not a joke.]

While Lisa and a cast of thousands repeat the harmony over and over again, are there any visual gags?  Not really, there’s just a bunch of animated choreography:

Spontaneous Choreography

I said “Step pause turn pause pivot step step”, not “Step pause turn pause pivot step pause!”

Aaaaaand scene.  Now, let’s look at the song from The Simpsons.  Again, lyrics first:

Hail to thee Kamp Krusty, by the shores of Big Snake Lake

Though your swings are rusty, we know they’ll never break

From your gleaming mess hall to your hallowed baseball field

To your spic and span infirmary, where all our wounds are healed!

Hail to thee Kamp Krusty, below Mount Avalanche

We will always love Kamp Krusty, a registered trademark of the Krusty Corporation, all rights reserved

First of all, this is much better, musically.  All the lyrics work within the rhyme scheme and nothing gets repeated ad nauseum.  It also actually sounds like a camp song, and is a much denser piece of writing.  Let’s count the jokes:

Hail to thee Kamp Krusty, by the shores of Big Snake Lake [“Big Snake Lake” doesn’t exactly sound friendly, and you could argue that it’s a joke, but I’ll let this one pass.]

Though your swings are rusty, we know they’ll never break [Joke.]

From your gleaming mess hall, to your hallowed baseball field [Two jokes, for a total so far of three.]

To your spic and span infirmary, where all our wounds are healed!  [Joke.  Total = 4.]

Hail to thee Kamp Krusty, below Mount Avalanche  [Joke.  Total = 5.]

We will always love Kamp Krusty, a registered trademark of the Krusty Corporation, all rights reserved  [Joke.  Total = 6.]

Not only does the song work better, but it’s also got a joke pretty much every line.  And that’s if you don’t count the meta joke of the kids (who already hate Kamp Krusty) being forced to sing the camp’s praises as a recreational activity.  Then, of course, there’s the accompanying imagery.  The “gleaming mess hall”, “hallowed baseball field”, and “spic and span infirmary”:

Summer Wonderland

Which is followed immediately by the triple visual gag of “Mount Avalanche”:

Mount Avalanche

Which is followed by the finale, when the one semi-wholesome camp image in the whole song literally collapses:

Kamp Krusty6

Nothing’s funnier than injured children.

And, of course, there’s the further joke of the bullies making them sing, including Kearney shouting at them to be “Louder! Faster!”.  Depending on how you want to count, that means that in the same amount of screen time, in the same format, and in a very similar setting, The Simpsons fit in roughly ten times as many jokes as Zombie Simpsons.  Zombie Simpsons isn’t watery gruel, it’s imitation watery gruel.


6 Responses to “Compare & Contrast: Camp Songs”


  1. 1 Derp
    29 September 2010 at 9:20 pm

    God damn, that is a great comparison.
    I fault the Simpsons for not just failing as a sitcom in this instance, but lacking entertainment all together during the song.

    “Marge paid with her debit visa.” Not only is it not funny, they keep repeating it. It’s just typical of the new Simpsons. They could have come up with a replacement line for the second and later repetitions but no, that would be too much effort.

  2. 29 September 2010 at 9:29 pm

    “Zombie Simpsons isn’t watery gruel, it’s imitation watery gruel.”

    Hell, that’s still giving this shit too much credit–it’s garden-hose water that wishes it was gruel.

  3. 30 September 2010 at 2:51 am

    Good comparison, especially when you realize that the Kamp Krusty song was created as filler material.

  4. 30 September 2010 at 4:24 am

    9 out of 10 idiots can’t tell the difference

  5. 5 D.N.
    3 October 2010 at 1:24 am

    “Kamp Krusty” (the episode, not the camp) is one of the most untouchably perfect creations in the history of everything.

    That is all.

  6. 6 Anonymous
    14 October 2010 at 12:13 am

    How is marge paying with debit visa a joke at all? I’d say you’d be more accurate to say there are no jokes in that song; Unless you count the starfish part.


Comments are currently closed.

E-Mail

deadhomersociety (at) gmail

Run a Simpsons site or Twitter account? Let us know!

Twitter Updates

The Mob Has Spoken

jbwarner86 on Quote of the Day
Hari Kondabolu on Quote of the Day
Anonymous on Quote of the Day
Anonymous on Quote of the Day
jbwarner86 on Quote of the Day
Anonymous on Quote of the Day
Troy McClure on Quote of the Day
Anonymous on Quote of the Day
Anti-Spam Crusader on Quote of the Day
Anonymous on Quote of the Day

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Reruns

Useful Legal Tidbit

Even though it’s obvious to anyone with a functional frontal lobe and a shred of morality, we feel the need to include this disclaimer. This website (which openly advocates for the cancellation of a beloved television series) is in no way, shape or form affiliated with the FOX Network, the News Corporation, subsidiaries thereof, or any of Rupert Murdoch’s wives or children. “The Simpsons” is (unfortunately) the intellectual property of FOX. We and our crack team of one (1) lawyer believe that everything on this site falls under the definition of Fair Use and is protected by the First Amendment to the United States Constitution. No revenue is generated from this endeavor; we’re here because we love “The Simpsons”. And besides, you can’t like, own a potato, man, it’s one of Mother Earth’s creatures.