Image, watermark and all, yoinked from here.
They released a promo image for this week’s episode, but Dave’s still on the run so I can’t get it bloodied up the way it should be. Instead, the picture above is the first Google Image search result for “Homer Scissorhands”, which comes from a now deactivated Deviant Art account. If you want to see the real promo in all its phenomenal drabness, Simpsons Channel has you covered. Here’s the nauseating description:
After Homer discovers a genius talent for styling hair and opens his own salon, he becomes Springfield’s most in-demand hair stylist. But having to listen to women’s problems and gossip all day long leads Homer to believe his gift may actually be a curse. Meanwhile, when Milhouse decides to live each day to the fullest, he comes out of his shell and professes his love for Lisa, only to have his heart broken. Milhouse then catches the eye of popular fifth-grader Taffy (guest star Kristen Schaal), causing Lisa to make a bold move.
Oh good, more awkward elementary romance and yet another new job for Homer. It’s almost like they’ve done this exact thing many times before.
charliesweatpants.com
(The crotch really does wear out too fast.)
So here we have two decent (just, barely) parallel plotlines that could maybe fill out two episodes on their own, but instead, the producers have decided to shoehorn them together into one box? Wow, this is going to suck, definitively. I bet you that there will either be no attempt to tie these plots together at the end, or an ill-conceived and contrived attempt to do so.
Also, I honestly can’t tell what the main focus (a.k.a. the A-plot) of the episode will be, when I look at both the description and the promo image itself. Is it going to focus on Milhouse’s fling? Will it turn the spotlight on Homer’s attempt at being a hairdresser? Now that I think about it, I think this episode will probably try to make the two plotlines equal to each other and tie them up in a horrible manner at the end, but even that’s too optimistic.
Finally, is it just me, or have the producers tried too much to give each Simpson some kind of wacky innate ability this season? Last episode featured Bart sniffing out truffles, and the one before that (I think) had Lisa doing magic, and now Homer has a “genius ability for styling hair?” Gee, if he had such a gift, why couldn’t he use it before to cover up his own balding? All this makes me wonder now is what “undiscovered gifts” the producers of the show might give to Marge, or even Maggie, next?
Correction: one decent plotline.
The Millhouse one would be passable if it hadn’t been done a couple times back when the Simpsons was good, and several hundred times since then.
Homer as a barber? Politely: Fuck no.
This does add to the laundry list of ZS plot-lines derived directly or indirectly from King of the Hill. For a long time they really wanted to make Homer more like Peter Griffin, now I suppose it’s Bill Dauterive. It’s a step in the right direction, especially because the direction is right off a cliff.
I’m used to them having Homer abandon the job he already has for some other pursuit, but I thought that having Lenny show up and talk about how Homer works at the power plant while they’re both standing there in Homer’s barbershop added an extra level of not caring.
full credit to that artist: their picture was funnier than the actual episode