Quote of the Day

Marge on the Lam7

“Mmm, engine block eggs.  If we can keep these down, we’ll be sitting pretty.” – Chief Wiggum
“That’s them!” – Homer Simpson
“Quiet, I can’t hear the eggs.” – Chief Wiggum

31 Responses to “Quote of the Day”

  1. 1 ThisCannotBeTheFuture
    4 June 2013 at 11:39 am

    “It’s a GHOST car!”

  2. 2 ThisCannotBeTheFuture
    4 June 2013 at 11:48 am

    It’s interesting how much humor lies in the clever use of language.

    In a ZS episode Wiggum’s line would’ve been “…if we don’t puke these up, we’ll be doing fine.” which conveys the same message but is not funny.

    It’s all about the sharp writing, having a feeling for which nuances for, etc.

    In fact, I pose a new challenge or blog post idea: translate your favorite quotes into ZS-ese.

    • 3 Stan
      4 June 2013 at 7:45 pm

      Engine block eggs? In Zombie Simpsons? My friend, the only thing coming even remotely to “funny” in this forsaken show are now scenes of Homer getting hurt. That’s right. Because hey, at least they don’t have to explain these!

    • 4 Stan
      4 June 2013 at 7:55 pm

      P.S. Let’s write shitty ZS episode parodies instead, just for fun. Here, I’ll start:

      “Dude, where’s my caaaaaaa-ANNOYED GRUNT-r?”

      Bart accidentally sells Homer’s car at Ebay, leaving Homer and the rest of the family obligated to take donkey-riding lessons. Homer ends up feeding his donkey junk food, and gets sued by a bunch of animal rights protectors in progress. Meanwhile, their car gets bought by Bumblebee Man.

      Guest stars: Nicki Minaj and Ian McKellen.

      • 5 ThisCannotBeTheFuture
        4 June 2013 at 8:54 pm

        Heh, that’s pretty awesomely bad….

        Don’t forget the montage of Homer learning step-by-step to ride his donkey, which contains a “derp!” scene where for a moment the donkey is riding Homer.

        Sprinkle in a few “ass-donkey” double entendre jokes, and the thing writes itself…

        • 6 Stan
          4 June 2013 at 10:07 pm

          lol I just invented the alternatively poor title: “Dude, Where’s My Cart?”
          Yeah, what a brilliant way to pass some “ass” jokes while at it! OMG it’s sooo funny!

          P.P.S. “Dude, Where’s My Bart?”

          Ok, I’ll stop for now.

          • 7 Rob K.
            4 June 2013 at 10:51 pm

            Stan, I think you’d be a great writer for the show, if they would hire you! Probably would steal your ideas though, and not give you credit.

            • 8 Stan
              4 June 2013 at 11:23 pm

              I’ve got the exact same reply about a year ago.
              Yet I prefer to leave it to the monkeys with typewriters.
              You don’t have to pay them, plus you can feed them with starved to death Korean children. And bananas.

              • 9 Rob K.
                5 June 2013 at 12:45 am

                Lol, good point, also that reminds me, yahoo news reported that Krusty Burger, based on The Simpsons franchise, is finally opening in Orlando, Florida though I heard that burgers will be around $13 a pop.

      • 13 Sumguy
        5 June 2013 at 10:50 pm

        Alright my turn. I’m going to need a plot that was stolen from another episode, so… how about ‘Bart Gets Hit by a Car?’ Only instead of Bart getting hit by Mr. Burns, it’s Homer, and he gets hit by Barney, who decided to start drinking again. Homer is hit in slow motion and bleeds all over the place. This prompts many weepy-eyed exchanges about how Barney needs to get back on the wagon, and the whole town (so Professor Frink, Sideshow Mel, Captain McCallister, and Special Guest Star Gotye) pitch in to make sure that Barney becomes sober again. Over the course of these high-larious high-jinks, Homer is punched seventeen times, savaged by wild mongooses, and shot by a nail gun in slow motion. The last third of the episode has Barney use a time machines stolen from Kang and Kodos to attempt to erase his alcoholism from history, prompting an extended chase sequence through the 1990s, which was when Homer and Barney were growing up, right? Eventually, Barney decides to give up on drinking for good again, and marries (rolls dice) Ms. Hoover.
        Oh, right, B-plot. So Lisa decides to make a Tumblr. I honestly have no idea where it goes from there, it kind of peters out at the end. And it features Special Guest Star Andy Dick. Un(?)fortunately, the episode is pulled from syndication after its first when an ill-worded remark about Phil Hartman from the Special Guest Star prompts Jon Lovitz to storm the recording studio and headbutt him to death.

        • 14 ThisCannotBeTheFuture
          6 June 2013 at 12:28 am

          I just realized The Simpsons foresaw this as it was turning into ZS:

          When Homer tries to pitch his movie about a time-traveling robot with talking pie as its best friend to Ron Howard–that’s just good ole’ ZS writing! Homer was pitching a ZS episode!

          BTW, all those zany antics in your pitch need a wackity-shamckity montage set to, let’s say, Selena Gomez.

        • 15 Frank
          6 June 2013 at 9:47 am

          Lisa’s Tumblr-type blog would actually be uploaded to a site called Bumblr, and would be called “Stuff my Dad does”, with pics of Homer doing stupid things (in the same vein as Angry Dad). Everyone in Springfield is seen walking around with their Mapple Y-Phones laughing at Homer’s latest antics. Poor Homer doesn’t know who is responsible for the blog so he enlists Anonymous/Julian Assange to infiltrate. At the same time, a new Bumblr called “Lisa the Preachy Nag Hag” pops up exposing the public to all of Lisa’s holier-than-thou tirades. Homer thinks it’s Anonymous/Assange and a hilarious hacking/chase/fight scene ensues (guest director Michael Bay). At the end, the infiltrator is caught while wearing a mask (don’t ask me why – it’s ZS after all!) and when uncovered is revealed to be Marge, who knew about Lisa’s blog, took exception to her headstrong, independent daughter picking on her Homie, and created the Lisa the Preachy Nag Hag blog to “put her daughter in her place.”

          • 16 colonelcoward
            6 June 2013 at 5:42 pm

            I like your calling it Bumblr idea, but unfortunately it is much to coherent of a story arc for a Zombie Simpsons B plot. Instead of having the “Lisa the Preachy Nag Hag” rival Bumblr page, they should just abruptly stop without resolving anything.

            • 17 Charlie Sweatpants
              6 June 2013 at 8:48 pm

              There are far too many ghastly ideas in this thread. I’m simultaneously horrified and kind of impressed, but as mentioned above, many of these are way too coherent. Calling it “Bumblr” is definitely something I could see them doing, though.

              • 18 Sumguy
                7 June 2013 at 10:53 pm

                Yeah, that was why I added a time machine and a marriage in the fourth act. I felt it wasn’t jumbled enough.

            • 19 Stan
              6 June 2013 at 9:11 pm

              Exactly. Too much going on. Zombies on pot won’t dig.
              BTW it should be called “Stumblr”.

            • 20 Frank
              7 June 2013 at 9:25 am

              did I mention that Marge’s sidekick was a talking pie?

          • 21 Rob K.
            6 June 2013 at 10:22 pm

            I love tumblr, I’m on it as 4thcoming or The Blog of Nothing btw and well said :)

    • 22 ThisCannotBeTheFuture
      6 June 2013 at 12:38 am

      More ZS ideas:

      Mike Tyson moves in with Flanders
      Reverend LoveJoy converts to Islam
      Homer travels to the past and meets Matt Groening before he created the Simpsons–get it?! It’s so meta!
      Bart’s new teach is a pair of conjointed twins (guest stars Adam Sandler and Rob Schneider)
      Homer gets a job as security for Justin Bieber
      Moe realizes he’s still married to someone he never mentioned until now (guest star Kim Kardashian)

      Mr. Burns falls in love with Smithers, only now Smithers isn’t interested!
      Lisa and Marge start an online store for homeopathy, but the town becomes flooded with magical crystals which reflect and make driving on the street simpossible due to reflected sunlight. (Guest star Hulk Hogan for some reason)
      A screw-the-audience retcon of how Bart grew up in the 2000’s.

      • 23 Stan
        6 June 2013 at 9:23 pm

        Mr. Burns finds out that Smithers is gay and fires him. Smithers gets angry and starts his own company, buying a solar power plant and only hiring women. One of the co-workers (starring Ellen Page) gets Smithers so hot that he suddenly loses his gay and becomes straight. He then goes evil and decides to use solar powers to get rid of all the gays around the world, only to be talked out of this by Ian McKellen. Meanwhile at the nuclear plant Homer gets promoted to Smithers’ place and starts treating Karl and Lenny like crap, until they finally get together and pay back with styrofoam rainbows. The episode ends with everyone admitting they’re a little gay inside.

  3. 24 FireFlower
    4 June 2013 at 3:51 pm

    If this epiosde was made today…they would have actually shown them throwning up those eggs.

  4. 4 June 2013 at 5:22 pm

    oh..that’s what it means? <_<;

  5. 26 Rob K.
    5 June 2013 at 10:30 am

    I want some steamed hams… Mmm….

  6. 6 June 2013 at 10:20 pm

    26 comments on a classic quote, and most of them are about Zombie Simpsons? Sheesh, I’m going to Moe’s.

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