Archive for March, 2016


Quote of the Day

Nerding It Up

“We’re having the best spring break of our lives, and we don’t need you around nerding it up.” – Bart Simpson
“That job is taken.” – Milhouse van Houten

Happy 20th Anniversary to “Bart on the Road”! Original airdate 31 March, 1996.


Quote of the Day

Bart Gets an Elephant10

“Look at this, Marge, fifty-eight dollars and all of it profit!  I’m the smartest businessman in the world.” – Homer Simpson
“Stampy’s food bill today was three hundred dollars.” – Marge Simpson
“Marge, please, don’t humiliate me in front of the money.” – Homer Simpson


Quote of the Day

Simpson Tide10

“Hey, Homer, bring me back a torpedo.” – Bart Simpson
“No.” – Homer Simpson
“But Flanders got his kids torpedoes!” – Bart Simpson
“Oh, he did, did he?  I’ll show him, I’ll bring you a weapon of unimaginable destructive power!” – Homer Simpson


Quote of the Day


“It’s your turn, Jimbo. . . . Someone’s been practicing over the summer, welcome aboard!” – Mr. Largo

Happy birthday Alf Clausen!


Quote of the Day

Colonel Homer18

“Tonight I’d like to try something a little different. It’s a song I wrote while I was mopping up your dried blood and teeth.” – Lurleen Lumpkin


Quote of the Day

The Telltale Head18

“Will my dog Pepper be there?” – Janie
“I’m sorry, but the answer is no.” – Sunday School School Teacher
“Why not?” – Janie
“Because Heaven is for people.” – Sunday School Teacher
“What about my cat, Snowball?” – Lisa Simpson
“I’m sorry, but the answer is no.” – Sunday School Teacher
“Will there be cavemen in Heaven?” – Milhouse van Houten
“Certainly not!” – Sunday School Teacher
“Um, ma’am, what if you’re a really good person but you’re in a really really bad fight and your leg gets gangrene and it has to be amputated, will it be waiting for you in Heaven?” – Bart Simpson
“For the last time, Bart, yes!” – Sunday School Teacher


Quote of the Day

A Fish Called Selma17

“Having a baby isn’t supposed to be work.  It’s supposed to be an expression of the feelings we’re supposed to have for each other.” – Selma McClure
“Oh, like how we built that snowman together in that Newport ad? Remember how alive with pleasure they said we were?” – Troy McClure


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