“Ethnic Mismatch Comedy #644 has been cancelled. While we scramble to find new programming, please enjoy this encore presentation of Princess Di’s funeral.” – TV Announcer
“Oh, I was really starting to enjoy Ethnic Mismatch Comedy #644. I’ve never heard so many Viagra jokes in thirty seconds.” – Marge Simpson
“We got new clothes from the donation bin. I’m a surfer!” – Todd Flanders
“Look, Daddy, Todd is stupid and I’m with him. And now Mommy’s stupid.” – Rod Flanders
“Can someone pronounce this work? Hmmmm . . . Bart?” – Mrs. Krabappel
“Uh . . . um, hmm . . . uh, um, uh . . .” – Bart Simpson
“Ooh, pick me, teacher! I’m ever so smart! It’s photosynthesis! Damn your feeble brain!” – Martin Prince
“Try to be nice to my sisters. It’s very hard on me to have you fighting all the time.” – Marge Simpson
“Oh, okay, Marge! I’ll get along with them! Then I will hug some snakes. Yes! I will hug and kiss some poisonous snakes! . . . Now that’s sarcasm.” – Homer Simpson
“Look, Daddy, I’m the Jealous Jockey!” – Rod Flanders
“I’m a torso!” – Todd Flanders
“Pull! Pull, you dogs!” – Bart Simpson
“Get out! This is my office now! Get out! . . . You too! This is a place of business not a peewee flophouse!” – C.M. Burns
charliesweatpants.com
(The crotch really does wear out too fast.)
The Mob Has Spoken