Author Archive for Charlie Schaldenbrand



14
Mar
20

Quote of the Day

“Oh, there’s so little left . . . creamed eels, corn nog, . . . wadded beef?” – Marge Simpson

13
Mar
20

Quote of the Day

“It’s a ghost car! There are ghost cars all over these highways, you know.” – Chief Wiggum
“Hold me.” – Homer Simpson
“Only if you old me.” – Chief Wiggum

12
Mar
20

Quote of the Day

“Okay, I’ll just even this out and . . . Mr. Lazwell, I’ve done it again.” – Squeaky Voiced Barber College Student

11
Mar
20

Quote of the Day

 

“Then I got this scar sneaking under the door of a pay toilet.” – Homer Simpson

11
Mar
20

Makeup Quote of the Day

“Lemme through! Lemme through! I’m her husband!” – Homer Simpson
“Well, that explains a lot.” – Eddie

09
Mar
20

Quote of the Day

“I like our chances, son.” – Homer Simpson
“Ugh. Your father’s not supposed to help build your racer but you should at least consult him about it.” – Soapbox Derby Racing Official

08
Mar
20

Quote of the Day

“That makes twenty-two to sixteen.” – Homer Simpson

08
Mar
20

Makeup Quote of the Day

“This one’s mine.” – Marge Simpson
“Keep On Truckin’? What does that mean?” – Lisa Simpson
“I didn’t know then and I don’t know now.” – Marge Simpson

06
Mar
20

Quote of the Day

“Why don’t you buy it?” – Bart Simpson
“I can’t buy that. Only management type guys with big salaries like me can afford things like that. . . . Guys like me! I’m a guy like me!” – Homer Simpson

05
Mar
20

Quote of the Day

“Nice to meet you, Marge. I saw your hair from the plane. And you must be the man who didn’t know if he had a pimple or a boil.” – Jay Sherman
“It was a gummy bear.” – Homer Simpson

04
Mar
20

Quote of the Day

“Screw the honor system, my car needs me!” – Snake
“Hey, you’re ruining it for the rest of us!” – Kearney

03
Mar
20

Quote of the Day

“Now, unfortunately, our school clocks have been running fast all semester. So, today, we all have to stay two extra hours to make up for the time we lost. Ha!” – Mrs. Krabappel
“Ohhh.” – Students

02
Mar
20

Quote of the Day

“Look, Marge! A restaurant owned by celebrities! I always wanted to be a celebrity!” – Homer Simpson
“Yes, it’s true, the entire menu was personally approved by my secretary.” – Rainier Wolfcastle

01
Mar
20

Quote of the Day

“Must kill Moe . . . Wheee! . . . Must kill Moe . . . Wheee!” – Homer Simpson

29
Feb
20

Quote of the Day

“It all started on the thirteenth hour of the thirteenth day of the thirteenth month. We were there to discuss the misprinted calendars the school had purchased.” – Marge Simpson
“Lousy Smarch weather.” – Homer Simpson

28
Feb
20

Quote of the Day

“Come on, move your butt! You’re blocking traffic!” – Marge Simpson
“That’s no way to address Sir-Drinks-A-Lot.” – Homer Simpson

27
Feb
20

Quote of the Day

“One ocean tango, we are in pursuit of a speeding individual driving a red . . . car, license number: Eggplant-Xerxes-Crybaby-Overbite-Narwhal.” – Eddie

26
Feb
20

Quote of the Day

“Evening, Simpson. You got a short in your tail light. Started blinking when you made that turn.” – Chief Wiggum

25
Feb
20

Quote of the Day

“Nice dismount, man.” – Jimbo Jones
“Didn’t hurt.” – Bart Simpson
“Oh, yeah, well, do it again.” – Kearney
“Nah. Might land on my face and end up looking like you.” – Bart Simpson

Happy 30th anniversary to “The Telltale Head”! 

24
Feb
20

Quote of the Day

“Mission Control, this is Corvair, launch sequence initiated. All systems go.” – Buzz Alrdrin
“Are we there yet, I’m thirsty?” – Homer Simpson
“Mission Control, request permission to sedate cargo ahead of schedule.” – Race Banyon
“Permission denied.” – Mission Control
“Ugh.” – Race Banyon




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