Archive for the 'Sacrilicious' Category


Reading Digest: “Jebus, Nudity & Both Kinds of Lefties!” Edition

Dolla Dolla Bill Y'All“Ching ching.” – Reverend Lovejoy

I think I successfully crammed most of my opening into the title this week, so there isn’t much need for an introduction.  There’s some other stuff too, of course, including an unusually specific Family Guy vs. Simpsons article, some usage, and a couple of interviews. 


Ned Flanders disapproves – On console first person shooter games I always have to reverse the look controls vertically, but I’ve never even looked to see if you can swap move/look from the left stick to the right.  But I’m not left handed, so what do I know?

Razer Creates Mouse For Lefties – But on the PC you can now game with either hand. 

History’s Greatest Monster – The great majority of prominent liberals here in America want the health care bill passed.  Some, however, do not; and of those a few have a hard time with Simpsons references. 

‘Fresh Air’ Reflects: Actress Nancy Cartwright – This is more than two years old, and I’ve only had a chance to listen to the first half so far, but it was interesting.  (via San Diego City College Acting for Radio/Voiceover)

Regarding the usage of “boourns” – This is a rant against improper usage of Hans Moleman’s confusing praise of A Burns for All Seasons.  I’m sympathetic to the argument here, which is that “boo-urns” is literally a term of praise, not one of derision which is how it’s commonly used.  However, I think the subtler and more fun way to use it as fake praise that belittles idiots who like crappy things.  To take a recent example, I’d say “boo-urns” to a movie like Transformers 2.  (Side note: I took two of my nephews to see that boring ass movie, the 11 year old didn’t like it that much, the 9 year old thought it was great.  That seems about right.) 

UK election: Most Brits want online vote – If there are any aspiring British political bloggers out there, may I suggest “Moe Szyslak” as your on-line handle?  According to one survey one in six Britons thinks he’s already a political blogger.  That’s a built in audience!  (via Citizens Online)

Corey – A remembrance of Corey Haim that explicitly links him to The Simpsons.  Now there’s only seven of them.

A question for Hepworth, Ellen and music journalists in general – This and the next two links are peas in a pod of fun Simpsons comment usage.  Here discussing music journalism:

For some reason – perhaps this was quoted on this very blog recently, I’m not sure – I’m put in mind of that street philosopher, Homer Simpson.

"You people have stood in my way long enough. I’m going to clown college!"

Excellent usage.

sick slowroll @ 2010 world cup of Poker – Here complaining about poker (or something):

lololol, that’s some weird logic lol. Like Homer Simpson saying someone who fell down a well is a real hero.

Not a quote, but still quite apt. 

Aldermen call for review of meter plan – And finally (there’s no direct link to the comment, it’s the first one though), this is a swing and a miss:

Even Homer Simpson would say Dough to this!

Mmmm, dough. 

‘Hubble 3D’: A spectacular look at the universe – I have no seen this particular movie, but IMAX 3D is pretty much always fun.  This probably would’ve made me giggle in the theater:

The scenes of the astronauts walking in space, performing delicate repair work while wearing what amounts to oven mitts on their hands, has a certain suspense. Narrator Leonardo DiCaprio works hard — maybe a little too hard — to muster up boyish wonder, though all the talk about tiny screws brings to mind the "Simpsons" episode where NASA shoots "blue-collar slob" Homer into space because the public has become bored with scientific minutia.

Vatican praises The Simpsons – Want to know why an institution as entrenched and well established as the Catholic Church can praise the show now?  It’s because Zombie Simpsons is tepid horseshit, that’s why:

I’m not a huge fan of The Simpsons, but I just watched a episode about Bart going to Catholic school called “The Father, the Son, and the Holy Guest Star.” [S16E21] In the classic Simpsons’ satire, Bart & Homer become Catholic while Protestant Marge tries to bring them back. WOW! A great episode to use with high school discussion groups.

He’s not a big fan of the show, but refers to “classic Simpsons satire” as a positive, all while ignoring the widespread belief that the Season 16 incarnation of the show was anything but “classic”.  Head spinning.  It goes on to mention that Vatican newspaper article which the church used to shake me down for eight Euros.  The guy who wrote the above is . . . well, I’ll let his about statement speak for itself:

I’m a 30+ year old (recently) former Catholic seminarian discerning the Lord’s call for my life.

That first statement tells you everything you need to know, doesn’t it?  He doesn’t want to give his exact age (“30+”), but he adds in “recently” to let you know that he’s not some deceptive 37 or 38 year old passing himself off as just “30+”.  (Organized Religion: Profiting From Your Fear of Death since 4,000 B.C.)  I don’t want to be too harsh, however, former Catholic seminarians are guys for whom I have a lot of sympathy.  My dad spent most of his 20s in seminary.  When he finally bailed, despite the fact that he’d been their unpaid employee for six years, the only thing they did was try to guilt him into coughing up money for room and board.  So good luck, man.  Trust me when I say the farther away from that organization you get, the better off you’ll be.  And if there is a god, he’s nowhere near them. 

Executive producer and comedian discuss new Comedy Central show – Simpsons alum David M. Stern’s new show Ugly Americans premiered this week.  I haven’t had a chance to watch it yet (though I plan to do so), but here’s an interview with him and one of the voice actors. 

Hank Azaria is latest actor to sign up for new Smurfs movie – The link title tells you what you need to know. 

Homer Simpson Is Not Alone: Trusting in TV – When a Jebus blog whose tagline reads “Looking forward to the Millennial rule of the Kingdom of God” (translation: I want the world to end) cites Homer Simpson, can the apocalypse be long behind?  Only if you consider 4.5 billion years a long time. 

CAMBRIDGE BEAT – A columnist posts her e-mail to speed the flow of angry complaints, and she does so with excellent usage:

Your opinion may not mean much to me, but as Homer Simpson once said, “Just because I don’t care, doesn’t mean I don’t understand.”

Shawn Maxwell Quartet: Maxwell’s House (2010) – Jazz saxophonist Shawn Maxwell has a new album, it contains a song called “7-G”.  You can listen to a nice, lengthy sample at the link.  (via All About Jazz)

THE SIMPSONS BART SIMPSON PLUSH VINTAGE DOLL TOY – This is a very weird looking Bart doll for sale on eBay.  His pants come up to his armpits and he has no shirt, it’s just odd. 

The Simpsons vs. Rhode Island (sort of) – This is from the same guy who wrote that recap of “Mother Simpson” last week.  I haven’t got much to add.  I basically agree with his conclusion, but it isn’t the way I usually approach questions like this.  I will say that I think “Road to Rhode Island” is a very good Family Guy episode, but it isn’t the kind of super-rich comedy “Mother Simpson” is. 

Jackson 5 Victory Tour Promo – This link has audio for “Lisa It’s Your Birthday”, but the real reason to click is the sweet picture of the Jackson siblings (looks like early 80s) all perched atop sports cars. 

Marge Simpson drawing naked on a Playboy chair – And finally, the YouTube below is exactly what it says it is.  Not only is it artistically impressive, it’s also a good – ahem – illustration of why I found it so endlessly frustrating when everyone kept writing that Marge was “posing” nude.  She’s a cartoon, she cannot “pose”, she can only be drawn:


The Petty Greed of a Large and Wealthy Organization

The Joy of Sect4

“Oh I feel for you my child and, I’d like you help you . . . ahem.” – Rev. Lovejoy

There was some hubbub over the long holiday weekend because L’Osservatore Romano, an official Vatican newspaper, said some nice things about The Simpsons.  This doesn’t particularly surprise me, Zombie Simpsons has become so institutionalized that even the world’s oldest surviving organization no longer finds it threatening.  That kind of approval is a pretty damning indictment for a program that found its original popularity in an explicitly anti-authority message. 

But I was curious as to what exactly the Catholic Church found praiseworthy and so I tried to find the original article.  It wasn’t on the hilariously primitive (and incomplete) official website, but there was an e-mail link to request articles.  So I wrote a very polite and friendly e-mail requesting either the text of the article or just a link to where the text was found.  I figured that they had it easily available and would probably send it to me and that I’d have to say something nice about the Catholic Church for a change.  My cynicism doesn’t fail me very often, but I do enjoy it when it does. 

Instead of the article or a link I received . . .  an order form – literally.  The e-mail I got back told me that the article in question was only published in Italian, but if I would like a copy I could have one for the low price of just eight Euros (Visa and MasterCard most definitely accepted).  Setting aside the fact that they want to charge me eight Euros for an article in a language I don’t read, there’s the bigger rip off of asking eight Euros for a copy and paste job.  It’s not like some hooded figure will have to descend into the archives by torchlight to retrieve this, it was published (electronically!) a week ago.  Pointing me to the article would’ve taken the exact same amount of time as copying and pasting the order form.  And they’re not asking for some trivial amount of money either, eight Euros is half a week’s earnings for half of humanity

I don’t care in the least whether or not anyone wants to believe in a higher power, but organized religion is humanity’s longest running scam and they give themselves away through sheer pettiness. 


Michael Shermer & Marge Simpson FTW

“Ned, there’s an oil stain the parking lot that looks just like St. Barnabas.” – Rev. Lovejoy
“Oh my stars!” – Ned Flanders

It is, and always has been, easy to make a buck by taking advantage of people’s beliefs.  This is something the Simpsons was long fond of mocking, from low grade hucksterism like Princess Opal to high grade hucksterism like organized Christianity.  The video below is a real world application of that same principal.

This is a talk given by a guy named Michael Shermer at the TED conference in 2006.  He gives a little explanation of skeptical thinking and then has some fun with stupid things that people believe, like seeing faces on Mars and hearing Satanic verses in Led Zepplin’s “Stairway to Heaven”.  Of interest to us is a water stain in Clearwater, Florida that people thought looked like the Virgin Mary.  (It was caused by the interaction of sprinklers and palm trees.)  Shermer points out that it just as easily looks like Marge.

This definitely qualifies as excellent usage.  I enjoyed the entire video, but if you’re pressed for time the part with Marge starts at about 8:20 and Our Lady of Evergreen Terrace makes her appearance at the 9:00 mark.

Found via Lalangue.


In the Beginning . . .

. . . television was without form and void.  Then this happened:

And it was followed a month later by this:

And the audiences beheld what was made and saw that it was good.

(Hat tip to Village of Joy)


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