Posts Tagged ‘Bart of Darkness


Quote of the Day

“Homer, my hat goes off to you.” – Bart Simpson
“It’s cool in here, boy. For the rest of the summer, we can live inside the refrigerator.” – Homer Simpson
“Homer, the fridge wasn’t meant to be used this way. Although, I must say, it’s certainly refreshing.” – Marge Simpson
“I got the idea when I noticed the refrigerator was cold.” – Homer Simpson
“Won’t this overload the motor?” – Marge Simpson

“Marge, can you set the oven to cold?” – Homer Simpson


Quote of the Day

♫”Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy…”♫ – Guitar Hippy


Quote of the Day

“Hello? Hey, I’m stuck in here! I gotta think of a way to get out.” – Lisa Simpson
“Well, well, well, look who’s come crawling back.” – Lisa’s Brain


Quote of the Day


“What fun can you have in a pool anyway that you can’t have in a bathtub with a garbage bag taped around your cast?’ – Bart Simpson


Quote of the Day


“So long, Lis. I’m gonna stowaway underwater and go where the pool goes. Have a good life.” – Bart Simpson


Quote of the Day

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“Sorry, Bart-dude, we gotta fill this thing with Epsom salts and jam it on over to the old folk’s home.” – Otto


Quote of the Day

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“Looks like it’s just you and me, Barty-boy.” – Bart’s Brain
“Oh, great, I get to spend the summer with my brain.” – Bart Simpson


Quote of the Day

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“Faithful Milhouse, you’ll spend the long hot days by my side, won’t you?” – Bart Simpson
“Uh, I think I lost my glasses in your pool.  I better go in and find ’em.” – Milhouse van Houten
“But you’re wearing your glasses.” – Bart Simpson
“No, I’m not.” – Milhouse van Houten

Happy 20th anniversary to “Bart of Darkness”!  Original airdate: 4 September 1994.


Quote of the Day

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“Get this kid a magazine.  Stat.” – Emergency Room Nurse


Reading Digest: Summer Lull Edition

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“Well, you’re certainly doing your job today, Mr. Sun.  Oh, rats.” – Hans Moleman

The internet didn’t have much by way of Simpsons stuff this week, so it must be the middle of August.  We do have some very good reads, though, including a Simpsons themed short story, a passionate, life long embrace of the show, and an excellent job quitting Troy McClure e-mail.  In addition to that there’s some Season 5 and 6 trivia, a couple of food related excellent references, and a couple of haikus.


[Note: I’m out of town and away from the internet for the weekend, so I had to schedule this in advance.  So anything that happened since yesterday afternoon, Harry Shearer conquering the Moon or something, won’t be in here.] 

Day 24 Prompt – A Future with the Simpsons – Smooth Charlie’s Link of the Week is this short story set in a post apocalyptic world.  A quick and funny read.

Madeline’s Farewell – Now this is how you quit your job:

Hi, I’m Troy McClure.You might remember me from such Out of Office Messages as Going to a Doctor’s Appointment that’s Definitely Not an Interview and Eek! There’s a Spider in my Ear!

I’m here today to talk to you about one of your coworkers- Madeline is no longer employed here

The whole thing is just as good, especially when little Billy shows up.  Bravo.

The first step towards getting somwhere is deciding you are not going to stay where you are – An entertainment industry internship led to a table read for Zombie Simpsons.  There’s a picture of the cover of the script for episode SABF14, “What to Expect When Bart’s Expecting”.  Going by production numbers, we should be suffering through that sometime late in Season 25 or early in Season 26.   [Update 7 Sep 2013: As the request of the author I’ve removed the direct link to the post, which has been deleted.  Looks like FOX cracked down for having a script title spilled on-line.  If that was our fault: sorry.]

A weekend of madness: I was promised sun! – Friends get together and start coming up with the top ten episodes list.  Season 12’s “Lisa the Tree Hugger” is on there, but other than that it’s all single digit seasons.

Under The Dome, a haiku – Bravo:

Stephen King annoyed

Not seen The Simpsons Movie

Didn’t rip it off!

Wring His Neck, a Simpsons haiku – More syllabic poetry:

Homer strangles Bart

That’s a criminal offence

Lucky it’s not real


Two Up and Coming Trends for Fall. – We’ve got male models wearing designer Bart stuff now.

THX Movie Opening – There was a reason they put the THX thing in “Burns’ Heir”, it was everywhere for a couple of years there.

TSTOgame on Flickr, share pictures of your town – Just what it says:

One of the most common requests I received when I asked for suggestions and general feedback was to enable visitors of this site to share picture of their town. So now this blog has its own group on Flickr.

Best. Episode. Ever. (Round 58) – Whew, “Lisa’s Substitute” vs. “$pringfield” is rough.

Speeding it up, slowing it down – Our old friend Alec Nevala-Lee informs me of something I don’t think I’ve ever heard before:

David Mirkin, the showrunner responsible for what are arguably the greatest seasons of The Simpsons, would often speed up an entire episode very slightly rather than cut material to fit the show into its time slot, which is why the dialogue in episodes like “Who Shot Mr. Burns?” seems to zip along so quickly.

Ehhhxcellent…Meh heh heh. – Giant Mr. Burns hands at Ned Flanders’ alma mater.

Jobs (movie)…In 10 Words – He was the first wealthy man in America to wear jeans with a sport coat.

Lee Daniel’s The Butler…In 10 Words – Then we’re all happy!

Face Off…In 10 Words – I do like the way the blush brings out my cheekbones.

Face/Off…In 10 Words – He can’t shoot if he doesn’t know which one of us is the real Krusty!

My Simplistic Review Of The Simpson’s Tapped Out Help Blog With Guest Blogger Tom – Just what it says:

Tom: Yes, the voices are done by the actual actors. The buildings all have unique animations when someone is in them. All in the Simpson style and look.

Chris:  I also like the Playboy Marge task where she goes around flashing the other characters.

Tom: There is no Playboy Marge task. This is a family game.

Chris: Well there should be.

Damn ESRB.

Our Simpsons-ized Family/Birth Announcement – Cool.

The first real test. – Going sugar free sure sounds tough, but this is an excellent reference:

There is an episode of the Simpsons in which Homer is hallucinating about being in chocolate land. He skips through a chocolate town with whimsical music playing. He hops along with chocolate bunnies, before grabbing one and taking a bite out of it’s butt. He spins around a candy cane lamp post and then takes a lick. It’s starts to rain chocolate and he gathers it in his hands and stuffs it into his mouth. It’s literally raining sugar in his fantasy land. That pretty much sums up my weekend perfectly. Except for me the theme song from Jaws is playing, the bunnies are rabid and are chasing me bent on my destruction, the candy cane lamp post is laughing a maniacal horror movie villain laugh and the chocolate rain is acid and I’m running for my life.

Wow, sugar, half price.

Holidays Ain’t the Same Without Some Carvel’s Ice Cream – On the food theme, here’s another excellent reference:

Plus, Carvel is known for making novelty items such as: “Flying Saucers”, which are ice cream sandwiches on chocolate wafers.  Also included is the “Fudgie the Whale”, which has made a cameo on one Simpson’s episode where Marge & Homer get married reading “To A Whale of a Wife”.

D’oh… – A short YouTube video of people falling down set to Homer’s favorite saying.

A Yellow Marriage: The Simpsons – And finally, this is more forgiving of Zombie Simpsons than I am, but it does make the distinction and this is self evidently true:

But one rule-one defining, thrusting, pulsingly huge rule-I live my life by is this: NEVER trust someone who doesn’t like The Simpsons.

Amen to that.


Reading Digest: Summer Orphans Edition

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“Oh, the gentle caress of a summer breeze.” – Martin Prince 

With the Fourth falling on a Thursday this year, the internet has been low all week, so this is a pretty short Reading Digest.  Two items, however, provide quite a few links.  First, a German guy wrote a book praising the show for its long history of not berating the gays; second, a young hooligan in Illinois put up some Simpsons themed graffiti, and we have pictures.  Neither is the world’s most earth shattering news, but it’s high summer, the day after the Fourth of July, and most sensible people are doing things other than hanging out on-line.  Things should be get back to normal next week.  In addition to that stuff, we’ve got a couple of surprises from the ongoing best episode bracket, Harry Shearer continuing his quest to be recognized as the hardest working man in show business, the Denver Broncos, and an admitted Simpsons-holic.


You Are Lisa Simpson – A tribute to Lisa about how her youth makes her impervious to all the attendant sexual horseshit that gets attached to other female characters.  Also, this:

This is the most traumatically perfect thing that has ever happened on The Simpsons. (‘Do It For Her’, is pretty good. But ‘You Are Lisa Simpson’ even beats ‘Do It For Her’. That’s how fucking good it is.)

That’s a tough one. 

The Simpsons knew it years ahead of us. – Reddit notices all the labeled wires, NSA among them, in “El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Jomer”.

The Simpsons helped me come out – A German librarian has written a book in which he praises the show for its early and positive portrayal of gay characters on television. 

Homer Makes us Love Homos – The Simpsons 25 Years – Reacting to the same book, this is a rundown of some of the show’s gay content over the years (including Zombie Simpsons), but it’s worth the click for the fan made drawing of naked Homer right at the top. 

‘The Simpsons’ Responsible For Mainstream Acceptance Of Gays, Claims New Study – Another writeup of that same new book contains this interesting tidbit:

“As a result, ‘The Simpsons’ conveys to an audience of millions a typically American, but an uncharacteristically open-minded, image of gays and lesbians,” reads the book’s Amazon synopsis. ”Despite the fallback to stereotypes, an intelligent, fair and entertaining handling of homosexuality can be observed in The Simpsons.”

The hinting with Smithers was pretty subtle at first, but I remain amazed that they got away with Karl in 1990.  He’s as gay as the day is long, voiced by Harvey Fierstein, and kisses Homer on the lips.  If that had been live action, there would’ve been riots, stations refusing to air it, and all kinds of other ugliness. 

The Best LeMons Race Car So Far: The Homer from "The Simpsons"! – This is mostly about the car from last week, but it’s also got pictures of another Simpsons themed car:

Meanwhile, in the Deep South, the uranium-handling Homer Simpsons of Stupid But Tough Racing (they have radioactive day jobs at Oak Ridge National Laboratory, so they really are Homer Simpsons) decided they’d make their Chevy Malibu look like The Simpsons’ pink family sedan and add a gigantic spray-foam Homer head to the roof.

The child size inner tube as a donut is a nice touch.

06/28/2013 – Someone got one of those Homer burgers at that Belgian fast food place. 

DAYTONA to Debut at Park Theatre, July 17; Launches UK Tour thru Oct 2013 – Harry Shearer is heading to the stage in Britain:

Directed by David Grindley and starring Maureen Lipman, Harry Shearer (The Simpsons, This is Spinal Tap, Saturday Night Live) and John Bowe (Cranford, Sweeney Todd), Daytona is a haunting, funny and poignant play full of mystery, with not one but two love stories at its heart.

Happy in their shared passion for ballroom dancing, Joe and Elli plan to win the next big competition. But the unexpected arrival of a figure from their past threatens to throw everything off balance. What can this man possibly want of them on this cold winter’s night? What can be gained from this uneasy reunion? When they discover the story behind his sudden return, Joe and Elli must confront a profound moral dilemma.

Bart Back With Butterfinger – FOX has started cashing checks from Nestle again.  Carry on.

Glastonbury 2013 review: lightning strikes for The Rolling Stones – Excellent reference:

In 1995, The Simpsons aired a classic episode called ‘Lisa’s Wedding’ in which a demented fortune teller foretold the story of Lisa Simpson’s first love. While glimpsing the future—a now distant 2010—we saw a host of eerily true predictions of what’s to come, including The Rolling Stones’ Steel Wheelchair Tour. And though a few years later than expected, last night we saw what could be considered the Steel Zimmerframe headline slot at Glastonbury.


Over My Head – Excellent usage:

In an old episode of The Simpsons, Homer takes his two daughters, Lisa and Maggie, to VHS Village because it is the “quickest, cheapest, easiest” way to do something with them. Upon entering the video store, Lisa dashes to what is presumably the children’s section while Homer finds himself in the sports section. He excitedly finds a video called “Football’s Greatest Injuries” and then yells out, “Lisa, we’re going!”

When we’d catch this episode in reruns, my sister and I would laugh at how much our own dad could be like Homer when he took us to the video store.

Ah the video store trip, relic of a lost world.

I want to change… – Communicating with upset kids through the medium of Maggie.

Close up look at The Simpsons collection by Converse: Part 2! – Just what it says.  This is the shoe with Homer on it.

Top 5 Worst Simpsons Episodes – I can’t really argue with any of these. 

Ross’ Turkey Sandwich | “Friends” | – Excellent YouTube usage:

But he wasn’t wrong about the Moist Maker. I imagine that adding stuffing to the sandwich, while delicious, is not likely to help in the moisture department. Leftover cranberry sauce would not be enough. There’s just no culinary crime like a dry turkey sandwich (Simpsons did it!):

Naperville Cops Seek Simpsons Graffiti Artists – El Barto strikes in Illinois. 

Skinner stinks: Naperville has a cow over graffiti art – A few more pictures from the Land of Lincoln, the one above the river certainly gets points for being acrobatic. 

spritz life – Fantastic graffiti of Jimbo and Martin from Vancouver. 

Grimey Dub – Awesome fan made image of Grimes as a DJ. 

Grads to Watch: Robyn Fortunat – The kids are alright:

All it took was repeated viewings of The Simpsons opening sequence, particularly Lisa’s saxophone solo after being thrown out of music class.

That’s what inspired Cowichan Secondary graduating student Robyn Fortunat to pick up the shiny jazz instrument.

"I’ve always listened to music, mostly jazz, easy-listening, since I was real young," explained Fortunat.
"I loved Lisa and her saxophone," she said.

Like Lisa, she often annoys her folks at home blowing out crazy-loud band repertoire tunes. Her dog, Orrin, isn’t a fan either.

But it paid off. The 18-year-old is headed to Vancouver Island University come fall to study in  its jazz program.

Good luck, young lady.

Number 1′s: Wacky TV Neighbors – Flanders makes the list because obviously. 

Best. Episode. Ever. (Round 41) – Season 17 vs. Season 19 yields:

The “winner”: KABF06, “The Debarted,” I guess.

Now that’s sarcasm. 

Best. Episode. Ever. (Round 42) – And a shocking upset where Armin Tamzarian comes out ahead of . . . Sideshow Bob?  I did not see that one coming.

Best. Episode. Ever. (Round 43) – Fudd?  I thought they took that off the market after all those hillbillies went blind.

White House Down…In 10 Words – Mr. President, those young people are about to get a dose of reality.

Doctor Who Monday: Vengeance on Varos…In 10 Words – I sure enjoyed those hundred tacos. 

The Heat…In 10 Words – It means they get results, you stupid chief!  (That movie was fantastic, by the way.)

‘The rirst report is always wrong,’ and other blackout lessons – Moderate usage:

After about the 15th time I tapped the space bar when I meant to hit “c,” or the backspace button instead of “l,” I began to feel like my phone’s touchscreen keypad was mocking me.

Just like that time on “The Simpsons” when Homer gains 63 pounds so he can go on disability, then has to dial 911, only to hear the following phone message: “The fingers you are using to dial this phone are too fat. To order a special dialing wand, mash your palm against the keys now.”

The irony about reporting on Sunday’s blackout, which punched out the Ellwood City area’s lights for more than half a day, is that I had to do it without electricity. So I wound up writing two stories for Monday’s paper from my phone.

The actual quote is, “The fingers you have used to dial, are too fat.  To obtain a special dialing wand, please mash the keypad with your palm now.”. 

66 Days to Kickoff – A Broncos fan remembers the low esteem in which the team was held until they won those two Super Bowls with Elway and Davis. 

What’s your favorite kind of lawn sprinkler?! – Animated .gif of Milhouse asking that most important of summer questions.

The Cartoon Character Couple Phenomenon and Couples Who Look Alike – Interesting:

The cartoon character couple phenomenon describes two romantically involved people who have such a strong resemblance to one another that they could just as easily pass for brother and sister. I’ve derived the name of the phenomenon from a handful of cartoon character couples who are, for whatever reason, drawn in such a way that they appear to be related. Some of the more famous examples include The Simpsons Kirk and Luann Van Houten and Mort and Muriel Goldman of Family Guy. Other examples include the perennially in-hiding Waldo and his girlfriend Wenda. Also, Starla and Muscle Man from Cartoon Network’s The Regular Show.

July 2 – Journalist Cocktail – A rundown of some famous TV news crews and what they might be drinking, including Brockman and Channel 6.

A cromulent addiction embiggens the smallest man – And finally, I get to end with someone who really, really agrees with us:

You see, am a “The Simpsons” seasons 3-9-aholic.


The telltale symptoms can be as far-reaching as social disconnection from the non-animated world, but as subtle as constant quoting and laughter. If possible, I would speak only in quotes from the greatest run of televised humor in history. Alas, I must press on with real-world anecdotes and speak to people with sentences I craft myself.

That does not mean I have to like it.

Preach, brother.  Preach.


Quote of the Day

Shankar and Krusty

“And now, what you’ve been waiting for, another long raga by Ravi Shenker.” – Krusty the Klown
“Shankar.” – Ravi Shankar
“Shankar.  Groovy, man.” – Krusty the Klown


Compare & Contrast: Suspense Movie Take-Offs

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“This can’t be what it looks like.  There’s got to be some other explanation.” – Bart Simpson
“I wish there was some other explanation for this, but there isn’t.  I’m a murderer, I’m a murderer!” – Ned Flanders
“Then that’s not the real Ned Flanders.” – Bart Simpson
“I’m a mur-diddly-urd-ler!” – Ned Flanders
“If that’s not Flanders, he’s done his homework.” – Bart Simpson

The Simpsons had a long and proud tradition of using classic movies or plot ideas as the basis of an episode.  Being The Simpsons, when they aped something, they didn’t just follow it, they used it as an ingredient in something larger and more varied.  The examples of this are too numerous to list comprehensively, but think about the way “Like Father, Like Clown” took some of its major elements from The Jazz Singer, or the way “Rosebud” used the central mystery of Citizen Kane for a story about a teddy bear, or the way “You Only Move Twice” followed the general James Bond template but from a very different perspective.  None of these are straight parodies, instead the source material functions mainly in the background to give the story a coherent structure and a satirical theme (in addition to plenty of material for references and gags).

Season 6’s “Bart of Darkness” is a stellar example of that kind of episode.  Its main story is about Bart going slightly stir crazy after being shut out of the usual summer fun by a broken leg, which is basically the same plot as the 1954 Alfred Hitchcock movie Rear Window.  But that’s only a part of what’s going on in the episode.

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Grace, come here, there’s a sinister looking kid who’s making fun of our movie.

Rear Window is a movie that relies on suspense, doubt and belief to create a lot of tension.  Sensibly, The Simpsons dropped those parts and only really used the main plot device, building the rest of the episode around that.  (There is, for example, no swimming pool in Rear Window.)  It’s still easily recognizable as a Rear Window send up (even without the two Jimmy Stewart appearances), but the menacing tone of the movie is completely absent for the simple reason that it wouldn’t work at all in a comedy show.  The episode certainly plays with the idea that Flanders murdered his wife, but as Bart says, “This is Flanders we’re talking about”.  There are jokes and gags aplenty (Schuman Farms Head of Lettuce, mur-diddly-urd-ler) to make sure that things never become dire or dangerous because, c’mon, it’s Flanders.

Compare that light and effective use of source material to the slow footed, heavy handed, and tone deaf “It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad Marge”.  There the basic plot is a take off on those (typically bad) movies where a manipulative stranger moves into the house and begins to fuck with the people that live there.  I’m not enough of a film buff to know the background of this particular sub-genre, but there was a spate of them in the early 1990s, most famously Single White Female, Poison Ivy, and The Hand that Rocks the Cradle.  That last one is the closest analog to “It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad Marge”, but they’re all pretty similar: a new woman moves in and begins destroying things.

Single White Ivy That Rocks the Cradle

Images yoinked from respective Wikipedia articles. 

Like I said, there were a lot of these.

As the basis of an episode of The Simpsons, you could do much worse.  Sure, such movies tend to be formulaic and bland (I once had to sit through Pacific Heights, a particularly wretched example with Michael Keaton as the interloper), but it’s a recognizable enough idea and you’ve already got the family in place.  The problem with “It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad Marge” is in the execution.  Instead of using the “other woman moves in” plot as a comedy where little or nothing is at stake, Zombie Simpsons plays it straight ahead, with lots of suspenseful string music and Marge going crazy in ways that are far more bizarre than entertaining.

That opens the episode up to all of the same problems that plague those kind of domestic thriller movies: wild and completely unbelievable plot twists, inexplicable but harmless incidents of danger, and characters who are repeatedly and unconscionably naive and stupid.  All of those happen in this episode, and while there is the occasional nod to the absurdity of the source material (“powerless to help you, not punish you”), for the most part they just stumble forward with Marge yelling and screaming and everyone else not believing her.

Marge Freakouts

The freakout ratio between these two episodes is like 10:1, minimum.

This is how we get scenes with cut brakes and a chase through a marching band and Marge generally acting like a nutbar.  (What was with her praying – out loud – in the middle of her commitment hearing?)  At the same time, her family just kind of watches all this happen (including Lisa, who would know better and who is basically set aside for most of this episode).  Worse, there’s nothing else going on.  The entire plot is Marge vs. Becky, which, since the conclusion is foregone and we’re watching an animated show, isn’t the least bit suspenseful.

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Oh, no.  How will Marge and the gang get out of this one?  I’m on the edge of my seat.

“Bart of Darkness” understood all that, so when it comes time for the scene where Lisa, a la Grace Kelly in Rear Window, goes to the Flanders’ house to investigate Bart’s suspicions, the scene is light on suspense and heavy on comedy.  Even when Flanders is walking up the steps, ostensibly to hack Lisa to death with an ax, the episode never takes things seriously in the least (the dog attached to Bart’s cast always gets me) and wraps itself up quickly.  The last scene (other than Martin’s humiliation, of course) is Homer quickly parodying those cliched reveal scenes from detective shows with his sarcastic sounding sincerity.

By contrast, even after all the crap Marge has been through by the end of “It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad Marge”, the episode can’t end without one more drawn out scene with suspenseful string music.  And even then it doesn’t make sense (so Becky really was trying to steal her family?) because Becky herself is as empty and incomplete as a character can be.  Recall that the show offers zero background on her or why she’d move in with the Simpsons after Otto took off.  Does she not have a place of her own?  Doesn’t she have any friends or family?  Shouldn’t there have been at least one person – at her wedding – that she knew besides them?  The episode is completely silent on those rather glaring questions, so when it comes time to end, it pulls that classic Zombie Simpsons move of just throwing up its hands and rolling the credits.

“Bart of Darkness” is its own creation, one which uses Rear Window extensively, but which has so many other things going on (Krusty re-runs, Bart’s play, Lisa becoming popular, etcetera) that the movie it’s parodying is only a small part of a much larger whole.  On the other side of the ledger, you have “It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad Marge”, the script for which is so hacktacular that it could probably be turned into an actual mediocre suspense movie with just a little bit of padding and an extra character or two.


Alone Again Natura-Diddily Makes Baby Jesus Cry

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“But I distinctly heard you say that Maude was with God.” – Bart Simpson
“Oh, that’s right, I was at Bible camp. I was learning how to be more judgmental.” – Maude Flanders

Much like the commentary for the Jockey Elves episode, the commentary for the death of Maude Flanders mostly dances around the actual events on screen and their larger implications for the overall history and health of the show. Also like the commentary for the Jockey Elves, George Meyer is here quietly commenting on things without doing any of the stammering defense/non-defense of the indefensible crap that’s occurring on screen.

What’s most interesting here is that they actually do acknowledge that Flanders starting to date people might have been premature, that Rod and Todd were too much of a bummer to do much with, and that death is awfully difficult to handle on a show like this. They don’t really say much beyond that, and it’s cold comfort knowing that they’re aware of the problems here, but it’s something.

Six guys on this one, though Jim Reardon recorded from Oakland, where he was working on WALL-E.

1:20 – Here’s an artful elision: “Maggie Roswell, the actress who played Maude Flanders had decided to leave the show for awhile.” Well, that’s one way of putting it, and I don’t even blame them. FOX really, really doesn’t like people talking about salaries, and that the subject was a no-go on a commentary doesn’t surprise me in the least.

2:15 – Scully chuckles as Homer sprays his crotch with bug repellent.

2:30 – The NASCAR drivers all turned them down for voices.

3:20 – Maxtone-Graham denies that it was supposed to be his name in giant letters, says he originally wrote it as Reardon.

4:30 – Long silence here broken by someone asking if that was another actress doing Maude, which, of course it was.

5:30 – FOX, which was broadcasting NASCAR, didn’t care about their crash heavy portrayal.

6:30 – Scully’s rambling about how they got to the death scene and how they didn’t want it to be “horrifying”. He seems nervously defensive, which I suppose is understandable.

7:00 – Reardon complains that the camera was supposed to pan right to show Maude as she went off the edge but instead it went left and cut her out of the shot. Calls it a “clerical error” that never got retaken.

7:30 – Meyer jumps on to try and explain what they were going for on the act break and admits that it didn’t work out and “just seemed grim”. As usual, I’m glad he’s here. As soon as he’s done, Scully, Maxtone-Graham and the rest of them go back to nervously laughing and explaining things.

8:00 – They wrote a scene where Ned talks to the boys about Maude being dead, but it was too sad so they cut it.

8:40 – That’s followed by more rambling defense of this as having a lot of “heart”.

9:20 – Selman brings up how dumb FOX’s promotional material was for this episode, where they teased characters like Homer or Bart dying when everyone knew it was going to be Maude.

9:35 – Meyer comes on to explain that death is really tricky to do, whether you’re doing a one off character like Frank Grimes or a long running one like Maude. He concludes, again without really defending the episode, by saying that “People just don’t like death, and I’m going to remember that.”

10:50 – After the scene with Bart and the Flanders boys playing video games, someone says, “So they’re over it, that’s good”.

11:00 – Selman’s just rambling along here for no real reason.

11:30 – Still going. Meanwhile, Homer just kissed Flanders on the forehead.

11:45 – Someone finally comes on and asks, “Are you waiting for us to get you out of this?”

12:30 – After some banter with Reardon, Selman actually asks him if he gets free iPhones working for Pixar.

13:00 – Wondering why they went right to Flanders dating and if that might seem like it was too sudden. That’s followed by an awkward silence before someone finally says it’s okay because it’s Homer doing it.

14:15 – Actually interesting trivia: Flanders ATM code is 5316, which is short of John 3:16 (the J being on the 5 on a nine digit keypad).

14:20 – Scully asks Reardon about how far they should go with Flanders’ pixilated horse cock, Reardon doesn’t miss a beat: “Yes, you guys seemed to have a real interest in looking at those model shoots.”

15:15 – A long silence leads to the generic “Shearer did a great job in this episode” comment.

15:35 – Smattering of laughter as Homer’s in the mailbox for some reason.

16:30 – Mostly silence, some commentary that they should check with the Bob Hope and Charles Nelson Riley estates before doing those “grr” growls.

17:10 – More long silence.

17:30 – Quickly noting that Flanders apparently took the park swan boat all the way home, then more silence.

18:15 – The framed picture of God that Flanders turns around had to be approved by the writers. Not much else is going on here.

19:00 – Oh, hell, Selman’s off on a rant again. This time it’s about how Ned is like Job. Mercifully, someone cuts him off after only twenty seconds or so.

20:00 – Reardon points out that when you have a long song you can’t just park the camera somewhere, you’ve got to move things.

21:05 – Now they’re discussing the fact that, yes, Hot Christian Singer Babe (whose name they couldn’t remember either) did come back in a later episode.

22:10 – Maxtone-Graham: “Let me just say that I’m a little sorry we killed her and I’ve been trying to think of ways to bring her back and think of what she’s been doing all this time and hiding out, but then we did an episode where we showed her up in Heaven with God, so I guess she’s really dead.”

22:20 – And we close with them chuckling about having Ned remarry someone a lot like her with the same name. Ugh.


Quote of the Day

Bart of Darkness7

“Oh, I’m gonna miss the whole summer.” – Bart Simpson
“Don’t worry, boy, when you get a job, like me, you’ll miss every summer.” – Homer Simpson


Quote of the Day

Bart of Darkness6

“Isn’t it amazing, the same day you got a pool is the same day we realized we liked you?” – Sherri
“The timing worked out great, don’t you think?” – Terri

Happy Birthday Russi Taylor!


Quote of the Day

Bart of Darkness5

“I wish you’d stop spreading bad rumors about people.  Remember how you got Grampa tarred and feathered?” – Marge Simpson
“Sure, that was twenty minutes ago.” – Bart Simpson
“Gonna be in the tub for a while.” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson


Quote of the Day

Swimming Naked

“Do not be alarmed.  Continue swimming naked.  Aw, come on, continue.  Come on, aww . . . alright, Lou, open fire.” – Chief Wiggum


Summer Programming Schedule

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“I’ll just spend the summer getting better acquainted with an old friend called television.” – Bart Simpson
“Hope you enjoyed that, kids, cause Krusty’s out of here for the summer!  In the meantime, we’ll be running, ugh, classic Krusty.” – Krusty the Klown

Memorial Day weekend is over and we’re a long way from Labor Day, so it’s time for the annual switch to Dead Homer Society’s summer schedule.  Reading Digest will still go up on Fridays, and we’ll be posting two Season 10 Crazy Noises per week.  (We’re going in broadcast order this time, “Lard of the Dance” should be up tonight or tomorrow.)  I’m also planning on doing some more DVD commentary posts from the early seasons (like this one).

However, as you can see in the image below, there’s still plenty of space on the schedule.  And while two years of this has made me quite adept at spinning bullshit into blog posts, I certainly appreciate any help from all of you fine readers and commenters.  So consider this an open invitation: guest posts, fan rants, photo essays about that time you made a Good Morning Burger; if it’s Simpsons related, contact us by e-mail and we’ll run it. 

DHS Schedule

Thanks for reading and putting up with us through another year of Zombie Simpsons. 


Quote of the Day

Bart of Darkness3

“Is it true we should wait at least an hour after eating before we go in?” – Marge Simpson
“Look, question lady, this job is not what I really do, okay?  I play keyboards.” – Pool Sharks Guy


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