Posts Tagged ‘Homer the Great

08
Jan
20

Quote of the Day

“Hmm, emergency call, gotta go!” – Stern Lecture Plumber
“What should we do until you get back?” – Homer Simpson
“Ah, put a pan down there.” – Stern Lecture Plumber

26
Aug
19

Quote of the Day

“I always wondered if there was a God. And now I know: there is. And it’s me.” – Homer Simpson

08
Jan
19

Quote of the Day

“Hey, Billy! Hey, Joey! Come on in! There’s plenty of room! Sorry, not you, Homer.” – Little Girl
“Why not?” – Homer Simpson
“But you let in Homer Glumplich.” – Homer Simpson
“Hyuck hyuck!” – Homer Glumplitch
“It says no Homers. We’re allowed to have one.” – Little Girl

08
Dec
18

Quote of the Day

“Why don’t people like me, Marge?” – Homer Simpson
“Everyone likes you, you’re a wonderful person.” – Marge Simpson
“Why don’t those stupid idiots let me in their crappy club for jerks?” – Homer Simpson

10
Jun
18

Quote of the Day

“I felt so left out.” – Homer Simpson
“Kids can be so cruel.” – Marge Simpson
“We can? Thanks, Mom!” – Bart Simpson
“Ow! Cut it out, Bart!” – Lisa Simpson

08
Jan
18

Quote of the Day

“Oh, for the love of God! Somebody get the jaws of life!” – Moe

24
May
17

Quote of the Day

“I saved your life! That egg sandwich could’ve killed you by cholesterol.” – Homer Simpson
“Forget it, Homer. While it has been established that eggs contain cholesterol, it has not yet been proven conclusively that they actually raise the level of serum cholesterol in the human blood stream.” – Lenny
“So one of those Egg Council creeps got to you too, huh?” – Homer Simpson
“Oh, you got it all wrong, Homer. It’s not like that.” – Lenny
“You’d better run, egg!” – Homer Simpson

08
Jan
17

Quote of the Day

homer-the-great16

“Yeah, I probably won’t be able to get the parts I need for two, three weeks. And that’s if I order them today. Which I won’t.” – Stern Lecture Plumber

14
Dec
16

Quote of the Day

homer-the-great15

“I know you think you’re happy now, but it’s not gonna last forever.” – Lisa Simpson
“Everything lasts forever.” – Homer Simpson

12
Jun
16

Quote of the Day

NoneTheWiser

“I can see everything, and they’re none the wiser!” – Homer Simpson

08
Jan
16

Quote of the Day

Homer the Great14

“Coming through!  Can’t throw me out, my father’s a member!  I’m in!  I’m in!” – Homer Simpson
“Okay, okay, Homer, you’re in.  Just don’t point that . . . thing at me.” – Lenny

28
May
15

Quote of the Day

TrafficReport

“Lousy traffic jams!  The traffic report’ll get me out of this one.” – Homer Simpson
“This is Arnie Pie, looks like we got a little accident that’s backing traffic up as far as this reporter can see.” – Arnie Pie

08
Jan
15

Quote of the Day

Homer the Great13

“Tonight we are here to commemorate our glorious society’s fifteen-hundredth anniversary.  And, in honor of this momentous occasion, we’re having ribs.” – Number One

Happy 20th Anniversary to “Homer the Great”! Original airdate 8 January 1995.

22
Nov
13

Quote of the Day

Homer the Great12

“Lenny and Carl are never around on Wednesdays and they don’t tell me where they go.  It’s like a conspiracy.” – Homer Simpson
“A conspiracy, eh?  Do you think they might be involved in the Kennedy Assassination in some way?” – Bart Simpson
“I do . . . now.” – Homer Simpson

18
Sep
13

Quote of the Day

Homer the Great11

“Loyal Stonecutters!  Let us begin our re-enactment of the Battle of Gettysburg.” – Homer Simpson
“Homer, you can’t just keep hanging out with these colobus monkeys.  Somebody’s gonna get parasites.” – Marge Simpson

Happy birthday David Mirkin!

07
Jan
13

Quote of the Day

Homer the Great10

“You put that sticker on your car so you won’t get any tickets, and this other one keeps paramedics from stealing your wallet while they’re working on you.” – Lenny
“Oh, and don’t bother calling 9-1-1 any more.  Here’s the real number.” – Carl

25
May
12

Quote of the Day

Homer the Great9

“Homer, a man who called himself ‘you-know-who’ just invited you to a secret ‘wink-wink’ at the ‘you-know-what’.  You certainly are popular now that you’re a Stonecutter.” – Marge Simpson
“Oh yeah, beer busts, beer blasts, keggers, stein hoists, AA meetings, beer night, it’s wonderful, Marge.  I’ve never felt so accepted in all my life.  These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined.” – Homer Simpson

17
Feb
12

Quote of the Day

Homer the Great8

“And by the Sacred Parchment, I swear that if I reveal the secrets of the Stonecutters may my stomach become bloated and my head be plucked of all but three hairs.” – Homer Simpson
“Um, I think he should have to take a different oath!” – Moe
“Everyone takes the same oath.” – Number One

16
Nov
11

Quote of the Day

Homer the Great7

“You’re a member of the Stonecutters, Grampa?” – Lisa Simpson
“Oh, sure, let’s see, I’m an Elk, a Mason, a Communist, I’m the president of the Gay and Lesbian Alliance for some reason.  Ah, here it is, the Stonecutters.” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson

Happy birthday John Swartzwelder!

03
Sep
11

Quote of the Day

Homer the Great6

“Dad, remember those self hypnosis classes we took to help us ignore Grampa?” – Bart Simpson
“Do I ever, it’s five years later and I still think I’m a chicken!  I’m a chicken, Marge!” – Homer Simpson
“I know.  I know.” – Marge Simpson




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