Posts Tagged ‘Homer’s Triple Bypass

07
Sep
18

Quote of the Day

“Homer’s in the hospital! They think it’s his heart!” – Marge Simpson
“Oh, my God!” – Selma Bouvier
“What?” – Patty Bouvier
“Five cents off wax paper.” – Selma Bouvier

Happy birthday Julie Kavner! 

09
Aug
18

Makeup Quote of the Day

“Now, I know I haven’ been the best Christian. In fact, when you’re up there blah-blah-blahing, I’m usually doodling or mentally undressing the female parishioners. Well, anywho, can I have forty-thousand dollars?” – Homer Simpson

18
Jul
17

Simpsons Has Warped My Brain

“Marge, this is Andre.” – Patty Bouvier
“Hello.” – Andre
“I think you two would make a lovely couple.” – Patty Bouvier
“My husband is still alive!” – Marge Simpson
“Oh. Thank God. I hope he pulls through.” – Patty Bouvier
“Not me.” – Andre

I’m sitting in a hospital waiting room right now while my Dad has (long overdue) hip replacement surgery. It’s about as low risk as getting cut open and having the top of your femur cut off comes, so I’m not really worried, but I can’t get the above quote out of my head. Like so many Simpsons jokes, it works in about five different ways: Patty and Selma’s utter loathing of Homer, the complete sleaziness of Andre (down to the visible chest hair and chains), the wild inappropriateness of him being in the waiting room, his blase dirtbag delivery on “Not me”, Patty’s deadpan sarcasm as she hopes Homer pulls through, and I think I’m forgetting a couple.

Now, hospital waiting rooms are grim places. Nobody wants to be here, everyone’s bored, and a lot of people are seriously tense. There’s a kind of quiet decorum to it where any activity that passes the time is acceptable, but having fun in any way is not. And I keep chuckling to myself about Andre, the couple making out in the surgery viewing room, and Dr. Nick smelling gas. When they let us back to see my Dad pre-op, the first thought I had upon walking in the room was “bed goes up, bed goes down”.

Times like this are when I don’t feel the least bit wasteful having dedicated significant chunks of my brain to remembering the show. What other program could de-stress me two decades after the fact? A stray line or joke, that’s easy. The Simpsons has whole scenes and episodes that amuse me wherever I go.

 

21
Jun
17

Quote of the Day

“I’m telling you, it’s not going to work. . . . See?” – Sideshow Mel

17
Dec
15

Homer’s Triple Bypass Gifs

BedGoesUp

“Bed goes up, bed goes down.  Bed goes up, bed goes down.” – Homer Simpson

Happy Simpsons Day everyone!  In honor of this momentous occasion, we’re having .gifs.  (As before, if there’s something else from this episode you’d like to see in a repeating compressed image file, please let me know.)

Continue reading ‘Homer’s Triple Bypass Gifs’

01
Sep
14

Quote of the Day

Homer's Triple Bypass21

“Don’t you have health insurance at work?” – Marge Simpson
“Well, actually, we gave it all up for a pinball machine in the lounge.” – Homer Simpson
“D/oh.” – Marge Simpson

15
Mar
14

Quote of the Day

Heart Attack

“You’re fired! . . . But wait, perhaps I’m being too hasty.  You are highly skilled . . . at goofing off!  Now, don’t worry, Homer, you’re the kind of guy I could really dig . . . a grave for!  Your indolence is inefficacious! . . . That means you’re terrible!” – C.M. Burns

Happy birthday David Silverman!

 




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