“Here’s what we’re gonna do. We’ll unload the kids on Patty and Selma Saturday night and then we’ll eat until they kick us out of the place, just like old times!” – Homer Simpson
“Saturday night? I’m not even sure my sisters will be available.” – Marge Simpson
“I’ll take that bet.” – Homer Simpson
“I’ll tell you one thing: Greasy Joe is sorry he ever saw the likes of me.” – Homer Simpson
“I don’t see why all this is necessary.” – Patty Bouvier
“C’mon, Patty, you don’t want to show up for your big date looking like Yosemite Sam.” – Marge Simpson
“If it isn’t little Jimmy Pierson, class of ’71 I believe.” – Principal Skinner
“Good evening, Principal Skinner.” – Jimmy Pierson
“Pierson! Get this woman a glass of water immediately, and tuck in your shirt . . . Nearly thirty and still working as a busboy. I tell you, standardized testing never lies.” – Principal Skinner
“
“F . . . L . . . oh, no, I’m sorry, that’s a C, isn’t it?” – Hans Moleman
“If that was an oncoming vehicle you’d be dead now! Next!” – Patty Bouvier
“But driving is my livelihood.” – Hans Moleman
“Oh, take it like a man.” – Patty Bouvier
“Bart, I’m flabbergasted! Surely you knew as you were writing your own name in forty-foot high letters on the field that you would be caught.” – Principal Skinner
“Maybe it was one of the other Barts, sir.” – Bart Simpson
“There are no other Barts!” – Principal Skinner
Sam Simon would’ve been sixty-years-old today. Happy birthday.
“I’m going to cancel.” – Patty Bouvier
“No, you’re not.” – Selma Bouvier
“We already have plans for tomorrow night.” – Patty Bouvier
“Patty, your first date in twenty-five years is a little more important than playing hearts with mother.” – Selma Bouvier
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(The crotch really does wear out too fast.)
The Mob Has Spoken