Posts Tagged ‘Simpson Tide

29
Mar
20

Quote of the Day

“Could Homer Simpson be a communist? His father spoke out on his behalf.” – Kent Brockman
“My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist . . . but he is not a porn star.” – Abe “Grampa” Simpson

29
Mar
19

Quote of the Day

“A seagull took my sailor hat.” – Homer Simpson

29
Mar
18

Quote of the Day

“Homer Simpson, you stand accused of eating half the population of the Planet of the Donuts.” – Tribunal Judge

Happy 20th Anniversary to “Simpson Tide”! Original airdate 29 March 1998.

29
Mar
17

Quote of the Day

“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” – Marge Simpson
“We have orders not to fire on anybody but Greenpeace.” – Homer Simpson

29
Mar
16

Quote of the Day

Simpson Tide10

“Hey, Homer, bring me back a torpedo.” – Bart Simpson
“No.” – Homer Simpson
“But Flanders got his kids torpedoes!” – Bart Simpson
“Oh, he did, did he?  I’ll show him, I’ll bring you a weapon of unimaginable destructive power!” – Homer Simpson

03
Apr
15

Reading Digest: Eating Like Homer Edition

Simpson Tide9

“Gentlemen, there’s only one solution: we place this last donut in the reactor core, exposing it to radiation, thereby making it big!” – Homer Simpson

This week we’ve got two links to great moments in food related Simpsons fandom, one on the consumption side and one on the production side.  Happily, both of them are even videos, so you don’t have to reduce your boredom by reading anything.  In addition to that, the play is spreading like the Osaka Flu, we’ve got three late obituaries, lots of drawings of Milhouse, a couple people who agree with us, another Simpsons-movie casting mashup, and more.

Enjoy.

Man recreates scene of homer pigging out on couch – Fantastic:

Bye bye belt!

10 illustrated tributes to The Simpsons’ Milhouse – More of “Milhouse from Memory”.  Damns, some of those are really cool.

Gone Girl: Cool Girls and Yellow Trash – Our friends over a Flim Springfield have done another of their .gif heavy casting calls.  Officer Marge as Kim Dickens is inspired.

The ‘Simpsons’ Episode That Introduced Homer To The Real World – A nice writeup of “Secrets of a Successful Marriage” by our old friend Johnny Sugar.  Also, there’s YouTube.

Principal Charming – Love this line:

“Homer, lighten up. You’re making Happy Hour bitterly ironic.”

Also, Noah would like some suggestions:

(EDITOR’S NOTE: While this will always primarily be a “rewatch-’em-all” blog, I’m thinking about occasionally doing posts about other Simpsons-related things, such as characters, locations, lists, what-have you. I’m criminally wishy washy, so if you’ve read this far, I beg you [please?] for some input. Advance thanks!)

Hmm, how about Ghost Mutt?  Or, like Hans Moleman in this episode, a look at the first (or only) time we see characters?

In search of some Modern Art – Tastefully and artistically done nude of Patty & Selma.

Posters from McGarnagle: The Movie and other films from The Simpsons – I’ve seen some of these before, but whoever put a Jay Sherman “Reprehensible” quote on the McBain poster was a genius.

‘Simpsons’-‘Goodfellas’ Lawsuit: Fox Wants To End $250M Suit – FOX has responded to that weird, longshot lawsuit.  I continue not to care.

The Simpsons Expansion at Universal Studios Hollywood [Video Walkthrough] – Would you like to watch a three-and-a-half minute YouTube of someone else walking through an amusement park in California?

VR vs. School – I will buy a VR system as soon as I can go where Genghis Khan goes, defile what he defiles, and eat who he eats.

Confusion Is Sex (1983) – A discussion of Sonic Youth that includes the obligatory Simpsons mention:

It’s obvious Sonic Youth didn’t get on The Simpsons off the back of this record. Nor did they want to. This is not the album of a band whose objective was mainstream success, rather the album of a band who just wanted to do their own thing and cater for the fans of their local music scene.

Of course, the blog header for their month of Sonic Youth is those damn kids eating Peter Frampton’s watermelon.

OakOak pays tribute to Banksy & Homer Simpson – Excellent Homer donut art.

Giant Donut Cake – And speaking of donuts, holy shit:

Full recipe at the link.

Twentieth Century Fox readies merchandise with new ally – If you live in India, FOX is preparing to blast the merchandising cannon at you directly:

Dream Theatre has tied up with Bio World, a Delhi-based manufacturer and distributor, specialising in licensed merchandise. It had earlier partnered with The Simpsons’ franchise outside of India.
“The Simpsons has a huge fan following and with direct-to-retail now an option, thanks to e-commerce, we plan to launch the apparel range in the coming months. The fact that our audience is also an avid user of the e-commerce platform makes it better for business,” says George. He adds that with a franchise that has been around for 26 years, it makes sense to have as many merchandising options as possible.
“We want to go as horizontal as possible with The Simpsons. Apparel and accessories are the most obvious routes, but there is a lot of scope in the novelty, gifts, collectibles and figurines segments. In fact, within accessories, we have products like mobile cases which are popular with young adults. So, you see, the scope to scale up is huge with The Simpsons,” he says.

I know those words, but that sentence makes no sense.

Tickets to Outside the March’s ‘MR. BURNS’ Now on Sale – The play goes to Toronto.

The Ball State Daily – And Indiana.

‘Simpsons’-inspired ‘Mr. Burns’ presents Bart as art – And here’s a review of the Minneapolis one.

Analog Stick’s – Top 3 most overrated games of all time – Simpsons Hit & Run makes the list.

Phil Hartman – Our old friend Gran2 has a new project called “Late Obituaries”.

Leonard Nimoy – They’re short but informative.

Sam Simon – And many, but not all, have a Simpsons bent.

Las Enseñanzas de los Simpsons – Heh.

New trending GIF tagged the simpsons the simpsons… – Homer getting back with the people, the young people.

New trending GIF tagged tv cartoon the simpsons… – His jiggling is almost hypnotic.

New trending GIF tagged tv cartoon the simpsons… – Homer doing the standard scream.

New trending GIF tagged love simpsons talking phone… – Sounds delish, he’ll just throw on some jeans and . . . wait, who is this?

117 – Adaptation and Bart’s Soul – Don’t feel bad, lots of people were unfamiliar with the works of Pablo Neruda:

I learned about Pablo Neruda from the Simpsons in an episode where Bart sells his soul. I learned about classic film, scientific theories and television history from them as well. The Simpsons led me to consume better art and comedy. It may be the easiest pop culture touchstone to praise.

Day 198- Simpsonized – Continuing from last week, more simpsonized portraits.

Day 199-Simpsonized – See above.

Day 200-Simpsonized – See above.

Day 201- Simpsonized – Last one, since from here it moves onto The Jetsons.

“You couldn’t fool your mother on the foolingest day of your life if you had a electrified fooling machine!” – With a little YouTube.

TV Pick of the Day – Wednesday 1 April – And finally, I get to end with someone who agrees with us:

Lemon of Troy is a classic Simpsons episode in which the neighbouring town of Shelbyville (boo, hiss etc) steals Springfield’s prized lemon tree. This may not sound like much of a plot but, in the capable hands of The Simpsons’ finest writers, it becomes one of my favourite episodes of all time. My favourite gag centres around Springfield’s belief that the residents of Shelbyville have a tendency towards inbreeding. Awesome.

Watch it for: The incest gag, the Shelbyville doppelgängers, a reminder of how good this show used to be.

But their cousins are so attractive!

29
Mar
15

Quote of the Day

Simpson Tide8

“Next on Exploitation Theater: Blacula, followed by Blackenstein, and the Blunchblack of Blotre Blame.” – TV Announcer
“Ooh, funky.” – Homer Simpson

30
Nov
14

Quote of the Day

Simpson Tide7

“Well, sir, treason season started early this year as a nuclear sub was hijacked by local man Homer Simpson.” – Kent Brockman
“Oh, my God!” – Marge Simpson
“I told him that photo would come back to haunt him.” – Lisa Simpson

27
Jul
13

Quote of the Day

Simpson Tide6

“Daybreak, Jakarta, the proud men and women of the Navy are fighting for freedom.  But you’re in Lubbock, Texas, hosing the stains off a monument.  You’re in the Naval Reserve, America’s seventeenth line of defense, between the Mississippi National Guard and the League of Women Voters.” – TV Announcer

11
Nov
11

Quote of the Day

Simpson Tide5

“Congratulations, you are all World War I historical recreationists!” – German Instructor
“Yay! . . . uh, oh.” – World War I Historical Recreationists

13
Sep
11

Quote of the Day

Simpson Tide4

“An earring?  How rebellious, in a conformist sort of way.” – Lisa Simpson

24
Jun
10

Crazy Noises: Simpson Tide

Simpson Tide3

“I was on PT 109 with John F. Kennedy.  I was the first to discover his terrible secret.” – Abe “Grandpa” Simpson
“Ich bin ein Berliner.” – John F. Kennedy
“He’s a Nazi!  Get him!” – Abraham Simpson

There’s no new Zombie Simpsons until September at the earliest (October? fingers crossed!), so we’re going to spend the summer overthinking Season 9.  Why Season 9?  Because we did Season 8 last summer, and Season 9 was when the show started becoming more Zombie than Simpsons.  Since we’re too lazy to do audio and too ugly to do video, we’ve booked a “chatroom” (ours is right between the one with the sexy seventh graders and the one with the bored federal agents pretending to be sexy seventh graders).  So log on to your dial-up AOL and join us.  This text has been edited for clarity and spelling (surprisingly enough, not on “Blaxploitation”).

Today’s episode is 919 “Simpson Tide”, 917 “Lisa the Simpson” was yesterday.

Charlie Sweatpants: "Simpson Tide" is 50% gold, 50% shit, but the shit is so black and stinky that I never watch the gold parts. There, I said it.

No, not black, green. That awful "what did I eat?" color.

Dave: Of the two we’re bitching about this week, this is clearly the weaker one.

Charlie Sweatpants: There are long parts of this episode that would not be out of place in Season 12+, and I hate them so very, very much.

Dave: Though to my point earlier, more watchable than I remembered.

Mad Jon: Meh, fair enough. There is definitely too much shit here. I do like the beginning. Probably my favorite part.

Charlie Sweatpants: Definitely.

Dave: It starts off strong.

Mad Jon: Pretty Classic Homer, wakes up from a nap, decides he’s earned a coffee break.

Charlie Sweatpants: Until they get to the submarine this one is amongst the top of 9, then they get to the submarine and it all goes to hell.

Dave: The intro wouldn’t be out of place in a classic episode.

Charlie Sweatpants: Yeah, it’s a little slower than "Dawn of Man", but it’s in the same ballpark.

Mad Jon: I like the scene in the recruiting office too, not as much though,

  Yes, Dawn of Man comparison is apt.

Charlie Sweatpants: But the recruiting video is great.

Mad Jon: Also true.

Charlie Sweatpants: And the Blaxploitation movies are hilarious.

Dave: Oooh, funky.

Charlie Sweatpants: Of course, two of them are real, but that hardly makes it less funny. [Ed Note: That would be Blacula and Blackenstein.]

Dave: Naturally.

Charlie Sweatpants: The first warning of danger here is that Moe, Barney and Apu join too.

Mad Jon: Most assuredly a loud, red, flaming alarm.

Charlie Sweatpants: The "Deer Hunter" scene is funny as hell, but it was a forerunner of just how boring the plot was to get.

I don’t have a problem with Homer getting into adventures in theory, but this is just noxious.

It’s one insane leap of story-breaking logic after another, and the horns of suspense are everywhere.

Mad Jon: The fact that all of those guys, after 1 week, understand how to operate in various roles on the sub is particularly angering.

Charlie Sweatpants: Or that Homer is left in charge. That’s just lazy. Admiral Baby made more sense.

Dave: Ha.

Mad Jon: Admiral Baby makes me laugh.

At least more than most of this episode.

Charlie Sweatpants: This just keeps going on! Enemy submarine! Pinhole leak! Surrounded by battleships!

Dave: Sparkle sparkle!

Mad Jon: The endless use of "it’s my first day"

Charlie Sweatpants: And all of them are played for action/suspense.

Mad Jon: And the recycled Nu-cu-lur joke that went on for 20 seconds.

Charlie Sweatpants: Most of the drill instructor stuff falls flat.

I get that they’re making fun of Hollywood drill instructors (Trademark 1987 R.Lee Ermey), but they have nothing to do with anything.

Dave: The stupid bodyguard song, ugh.

Charlie Sweatpants: And they’re not funny. It’s Homer acting invincibly.

  I hate that.

Pretty much the only thing that doesn’t suck in the second half of this one is the whole Soviet Union thing. "Must crush Capitalism" is grand. But it’s not enough.

The rest is just blindingly bad and boring.

Mad Jon: Oh yeah the Russia into the USSR is really funny. Kind of drags on, but ends with Lenin which is worth the wate.

  Wait.*

Dave: Is the answer more Lenin, less Homer?

Mad Jon: Apparently I now spell phonetically when I’ve been drinking.

Charlie Sweatpants: The answer is less "action".

Mad Jon: Well, nowadays I would be happy to have 8-9 seconds of Homer per episode.

Charlie Sweatpants: It also kinda bugs me that Homer gets fired and it’s not a big deal.

Homer’s left the plant before, but he finds a way back. This time you get the feeling that they’re just working from their template.

Mad Jon: Ah yes, but this breaks us down for the fact that in the next 10 seasons he spends approximately 10 minutes at work.

And 9 of those are in season 10.

Charlie Sweatpants: Pretty much.

They made a joke about it in 11 or 12. It didn’t help.

  Or maybe that’s 10. I forget.

Mad Jon: Something along the lines of "the timing’s good, I just got fired again."

But I couldn’t tell you what plot line that is from…

Charlie Sweatpants: That’s not the one I was thinking of.

I looked it up, it’s from the one where Maude dies: http://www.snpp.com/episodes/BABF10.

Mad Jon: Well, I’m not surprised there are multiples.

Charlie Sweatpants: It didn’t matter as much in "You Only Move Twice", but even at the time it felt downhill.

Dave: Did it?

That’s a pretty good episode in my book.

Charlie Sweatpants: A little, but this one kinda confirmed it.

Dave: Well, I’m not going to damn the former because of the latter.

Charlie Sweatpants: Not at all.

  "You Only Move Twice" is as good as Season 8 gets, there’s a reason we didn’t do a Crazy Noises on it. This one is much, much worse. They’re not even in the same conversation, and it’s with this one that I really began getting the feeling that they were phoning it in.

That one was a good idea that had Homer in it, this one was "Hey, we haven’t made him a sea captain yet!".

  If that makes sense.

Mad Jon: Yeah, I can see that, although I never really have taken much time to sort out when I thought they started phoning it in. Not that I at all disagree with you.

Dave: Yeah, the inflection point is less clear in my book, but your point is well taken.

Charlie Sweatpants: Anything else? Thinking about this episode is making me cranky.

Mad Jon: A just feeling my lord.

Charlie Sweatpants: What have you been watching lately?

Mad Jon: Nothing. It’s summer.

15
Aug
09

Quote of the Day

Simpson Tide2

“Lost this eye in Haiti.  I was drinking a Mai Tai and I forgot to take the little parasol out.” – Veteran of an Unpopular War

01
May
09

Friday Link Dump – Communist Edition

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“Must . . . crush . . . capitalism!” – Lenin

It’s May Day, and that means it’s time to clean the blood of the workers from the machinery of capitalism.

Five Reactionary Rules of The Simpsons – Have you always wanted to read an 1,800 word dissection of The Simpsons written by a communist?  Today’s your day.  I love the internet, truly the home of the bizarre rant. 

Do you know The Simpsons?  Take our quiz – There are a lot of Simpsons quizzes out there, but this one gets linked because it has an answer I consider debatable.  The questions are divided up into “Easy” and “Hard”, but even the “Hard” questions are a snap if you’re a fan, except this one, “7: What was the name of Homer’s personal assistant?”  Now, my answer was Eugene Fisk; instead they went with the far better known “MoJo”.  I object though, MoJo was a helper monkey, Fisk was actually, at least for a short time, Homer’s assistant.  

Axing The Simpsons would be commercial suicide for Ten – There was a nervous rumor going around Australia the last week that the Ten network was going to stop running repeats of The Simpsons.  It turned out to be bogus (as the linked story shows) but it’s a nice reminder that a lot of people still depend on regular repeats.  As Zombie Simpsons increasingly polluted the syndication runs I changed how I watch repeats, first to the DVDs and now to the rips of the DVDs I’ve got on my PC.  Of course, not everyone has the financial and technical resources (to say nothing of the interest) required to do that.  When I think back to a time when I had to depend on the programming monkeys at local television stations to determine which episodes I got to watch, and when I got to watch them, it’s like a nightmare.  

The Simpsons help Character World fight recession – A British manufacturer of licensed crap is glad that Simpsons crap sells no matter how bad the economy is doing.  (Curiously, Simpsons is mentioned in the headline and there’s a photo of Homer, but the show isn’t mentioned in the actual story.)

Peter Rook: on dealing with that mysterious bump in the night – This guy’s wife used to make him investigate phantom burglars in his Homer Simpson underpants.  As uninteresting as that sounds, it’s actually much more boring if you read the whole thing.  

He’s still around you know.. – Sadly, this does not seem to be satire:

I’m tired of trying to convince my friends at pubs to go home and see for themselves how funny these new episodes are.. and I just want to send out a virtual plea.. check it out once more? Sure..I COULD go into details about the type of jokes they’re shooting out but I’m certain most of you have been feeling rather soured by the last few years of Simpson mediocrity..rest assured these new ones are good.

Oh, I’m feeling soured alright, but “these new ones” are just as bad as anything that’s come before them.  

Cherry Coke vs. the corn industry – Daniel Greenberg of the University of Arizona’s Daily Wildcat gets a gold star for usage.  He got the quote right and it worked in context.  Observe:

Cherry Coke uses corn syrup because, due to the artificial price controls, the high-fructose corn ingredient becomes much cheaper than processed sugar beets or canes. Sugar was once white gold. Even Homer (Simpson) once said, “A mountain of sugar is too much for one man. It’s clear now why God portions it out in those tiny packets.”

No mention of the plantation in Hawaii, but that’s okay.  Good work young man.  

‘Obsessed’ with cliches – The fact that Stringer Bell is in it doesn’t make me want to see it, neither does this choice excerpt:

He never strays or shows any signs of temptation as this girl flings herself at him. It’s like watching Ned Flanders try to fight off Edna Krabappel—never sexy, just uncomfortable and mildly amusing.

Flanders fighting off the advances of Krabappel sounds like something Zombie Simpsons would do.  I hope they didn’t read this.  

DINING REVIEW: Thai restaurant doesn’t take shortcuts on tasty dishes – Do you live in Colorado Springs and enjoy Thai food?  Then you’re in luck as this review uses Lisa Simpson to explain the discrepancies in spiciness one often finds at Asian restaurants.  

Man who Tasered himself goes free – Our old pal Ricky Hodgkinson walked on his possession of an illegal weapon charge, no jail time for the “Homer Simpson defence” guy.

Awesome.

Awesome.

Finally, Dave found this picture of a kid wearing a sweet Krusty balloon head on Flickr.  I’m no balloon expert, but that appears to be at least a dozen of them in there and it looks phenomenal.  All thanks go to Flickr user Extreme Craft.




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