Dead Homer Society

“Children, we’ve just been tipped off that Superintendent Chalmers is planning a surprise inspection, so let’s clean up this pigsty!” – Principal Skinner

“Did you bring the pre-whacked snakes? . . . Beautiful.” – Mayor Quimby

Happy Whacking Day, everybody!

“I’m new in town. Be there a cool loch where a lass could wash her long, red hair?” – Hot Scot
“Nay, but there’s a pool at me apartment complex. There was a rat in the deep end . . . but we got him!” – Groundskeeper Willie
“Ach, lead on!” – Hot Scot

“Here you go! Official Whacking Day parking! Ten dollars per axle! . . . Woo-hoo!” – Homer Simpson
“Hooray” – Axle Car Guy

Happy Whacking Day, everybody!

“Ack, my beauty! Wait until the superintendent sees you! Were it not a violation of God’s law, I’d make you my wife!” – Groundskeeper Willie

“Beans, beans, the musical fruit, the more you eat, the more you toot!” – Bart Simpson
“Avert your eyes, children! He may take on another form!” -Springfield Christian School Teacher