16
Apr
14

Quote of the Day

Homer vs. The 18th Amendment10

“Aw, geez, this looks bad.  Better turn on the old Wiggum charm.” – Chief Wiggum
“Pervert!” – Helen Lovejoy
“Oh, boy, that sounded bad.” – Chief Wiggum

15
Apr
14

Quote of the Day

Two Bad Neighbors11

“I’m sorry I spanked your boy, Homer.” – Bush the Elder
“Woo-hoo!  In your face, Bush!  Now apologize for the tax hike.” – Homer Simpson

14
Apr
14

Behind Us Forever: Days of Future Future

Chalkboard - Days of Future Future

“Bart, you cast the wrong spell!  Zombies!” – Lisa Simpson

So, was this episode the Futurama crossover or not?  I didn’t see Fry or Leela, but there was a beer swilling robot and lots of inter-species relationships, so I’m not entirely sure.  Also, part of it was a coma fantasy or a dream sequence, but I don’t have access to an original script so I don’t know if those pages were on pink paper or goldenrod.

For those of you sage enough not to have watched it, we begin in the present when Homer dies.  Frink, and remember, this is supposed to be the present, brings in a clone of Homer to the funeral.  Homer then spends the next few minutes dying and coming back as a clone.  Eventually it’s thirty years from now and Homer becomes a computer program instead.  In that future, Bart is divorced from Amy Poehler, Lisa is married to Milhouse (who becomes a literal zombie because now they’re just fucking with me), and Marge eventually also becomes a computer program who gets eaten or something by Homer.  Seriously, the end is so confusing that they have Moe say that he doesn’t get it.

- Hey, the couch gag was short and clever for a change.

- Ah, for the days when Homer eating in his underwear was funny instead of a harbinger of boredom.

- “You’re alive, but how?” – Time to have things explained.

- We got to the death montage nice and quick.  It’s a completely unnecessary death montage, but at least they didn’t dawdle.

- Oh, look, there’s an incinerator-bot that looks like something that was reject from a Futurama storyboard back in 2003 or so.  Has Zombie Simpsons resorted to dumpster diving the Futurama offices?

- “All is not lost, I was able to download Homer’s brain into this flash drive.” – They know we’re pretty much as far from Halloween as it is possible to get on the calendar, right?

- Bart’s ex-wife is dating an Alien alien named Jerry.  I am not making this up.

- Okay, the “Cretaceous Park” sign (“Now Correctly Named”) was kinda funny.

- You know, all this talk of zombies reminds me that Ugly Americans had its moments.  It never quite got there, but it was a hell of a lot better than this.

- At least this Total Recall scene didn’t take long.

- It’s our second song montage.  The first one was Homer dying.  This one is Bart getting laid.

- Clown group sex, didn’t see that one coming.

- A robot drinking alcohol . . . where have I seen that before?

- It’s pure fan service and couldn’t hope to salvage even a little bit of this episode, but they have adult Maggie and Gerald sucking on a straw together.  It was quick and almost charming.

- Nice of Marge to pop out from behind that plant at Moe’s for an expository conversation about marriage with her kids.

- “Wait, Mom, does that mean you’re gonna take Dad back?”, see what I mean?

- So, Marge just digitized herself and was eaten by Homer.  Moe, speaking for all of us, says “I can’t tell if that was love, suicide or a really boring video game.”  The “really boring” part certainly applies.

- Oh, that couch gag was a fan idea.  No wonder it didn’t suck.

Zombie Simpsons likes to take any decent joke and run it into the ground with repetition, and this was them doing that on an episode scale.  A couple of seasons ago they did that “Holiday of Future’s Passed” episode where they did Christmas in the future.  I wasn’t a fan, but they got a little bit of positive attention from it, so the natural thing to do would be to go back and stretch everything there way past the breaking point.  It’s just their style.

Anyway, the ratings are in and they are unprecedentedly wretched.  Last night, just 3.59 million people hoped that this show gets canned sometime in the next thirty years.  That’s good for second lowest all time, bested only by the non-8pm slot “Diggs” episode from last month.  Seven of the ten lowest rated ever, including the entire bottom five, have been broadcast since January.

14
Apr
14

Quote of the Day

Burns' Heir11

“Okay, let’s make this sporting, Leonard.  If you can tell me why I shouldn’t fire you without using the letter e, you can keep your job.” – C.M. Burns
“Uh, okay, um, I’m a good work . . . guy.” – Lenny
“You’re fired.” – C.M. Burns
“But I didn’t say-” – Lenny
“You will.” – C.M. Burns
“Eeeeeeee!” – Lenny

Happy 20th anniversary to “Burns’ Heir”!  Original airdate: 14 April 1994.

13
Apr
14

Sunday Preview: Days of Future Future

Days_of_Future_Future_promo_4

Set in the future, Homer has a new clone for every time he dies. Lisa is married to a zombie version of Milhouse, while Bart deals with custody issues with his ex-wife, Jenda. Each defines what love means to them.

Well that reads like a THOH synopsis if  I’ve ever seen one.  Amy Poehler is going to voice Jenda, so obviously she must be in some serious debt, or have some bodies somewhere that Al Jean found out about.

13
Apr
14

Quote of the Day

Summer of 4 Ft 2(13)

“Put food in me.” – Marge Simpson
“I’ll take that.” – Homer Simpson

12
Apr
14

Quote of the Day

Secrets of a Successful Marriage8

“And how is my little major leaguer, catch any junebugs today?” – Homer Simpson
“Well, me and Milhouse took some mail from a mail truck and threw it down the sewer.” – Bart Simpson
“Son, I know you meant well, but that wasn’t the right thing to do.” – Homer Simpson
“What the hell are you talking about?  You’re the one who double dared us.” – Bart Simpson




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